Roommate ?!?!?!

Apparently all I am to him is a " roommate ". Afterall, why would he tell a phone comp. rep that I'm his " roommate ", and not his " girlfriend " ?! ... Would it have really pained him so much to call me his " girlfriend ", instead of his " roommate " ? I guess so. 

I suppose it shouldn't surprise me any since we do just about everything separately these days. He's set up things so he barely has much of a reason at all to come out of the bedroom. 

What I can't quite figure out is why is this bothering me ?! It probably should be a relief, if anything, since as long as he's in the bedroom doing " his thing " - ( flirting online-or on his cell phone, playing a video game, or taking a nap... or looking at porn on his cell phone ) - while he's doing those things, I'm completely free to do whatever I want in the rest of the apartment. 

Of course I " should be " completely free to do whatever I want ANYWHERE in this / MY apartment whenever I want to, but with him here that's next to impossible for the most part ! 

He's so damn paranoid, and controlling most of the time that sometimes it seems like he can't even stand it when I'm sitting in my recliner listening to pandora.com on my laptop. Jealous of pandora.com ?! Really ?! WHY ? Completely ridiculous, especially when I'd have every right to be paranoid and/or jealous when he's online on the main computer in the corner of the living room chatting with his " facebook friends " ! But from past BAD experiences I know better than to say even ONE WORD about his online chats, even when it's pretty obvious that he's probably chatting with a woman ! 

It's getting close to 6 pm - Thursday June 27 th - right now, and he's in the bedroom taking a nap. As he went in there he told me to take a nap too, but there was just NO WAY after the day I had that I could have done that ! 

How could I nap when I'm too busy wondering HOW he's going to act tomorrow morning when the phone company repair tech comes by between 10 - 11 AM ?! Besides, I'm also simply in just too much pain to " nap " ! Of course he was RUDE, and CRUEL to me... calling me NAMES, just because I told him that I had a bad headache ! ... He said.. " Do you want some Wine with that Cheese ?! " I told him... be quiet ! Stop it ! Because you whine about pains, etc... plenty of times too !!!! ... and YOU know it ! He shrugged me off... as usual, completly ignoring what I said ! But that's nothing new at all ! 

How can you say, " I love you " to me sometimes - ( not very often, but sometimes ) - and STILL act the way he does towards me ?.... So cold, rude, uncompassionate, uncaring, impatient, demanding, unreasonable, and full of rage !?! ... He thinks that's LOVE ?!