reflection

I haven't talked to my MOm in over a month, we had a falling out, she said she wanted to get rid of a dog she had found. So I called my sisters, talked to her husband , and said no pressure just wanted to know if you guys would be interested, Well sister came to my moms  house this is where I was, walked in the door, I said Hi, she started right in with "don't start on me about the dog, I have no money proceeded to tell how much money she doesn't have,and carried on and on  like no tommorrow about the dog thing. I told her I was just bringing it up as you said you wanted a fun little dog that you don't have to take it "let it go". All the time she was ranting at me my Mom just sat there and said nothing to her, just sat there and listened to her go  off on me. which was bad enough, but then my mom's roommate came in, he's a major drama king, My sister was still going on and on about the dog, which then set off the drama king roommate, Why, are you getting rid of the dog, nobody told me about this.he proceeded to HUFF and PUFF and stomp and rant on about it, Well I  told him it was just an idea that Mom was thnking about nothing was final, but that didn't stop him or my sister from ranting and raving, I finally had enough, so I started stomping and ranting in a mocking way, which of course then my Mom reacted, She got mad at ME I had just sat thru 20 minutes of everyones elses bullshit. But yet I was the one that was wrong, even though I had only done what she had wanted, which was to help find a home for the stupid dog. Well I felt so betrayed, by Mom and told her so, her reaction to that was to get upset and cry I''m going to have a heartattack, Sister is now running aroung screaming that I was going to be the death of Mom, (mind you I had just had her at my house taking care of her for the last 5 days) meanwhile the drama king roommate is till huffing and puffing around, now saying I'm moving out, That I always do things like this to him, what did I do, just what Mom had asked. but does mom back me up Hell no, she just throws me under a bus like always . So thats where things are left at this time I'm not talking to her, she is whom I work for, so now she doesn't call me to work. So now I can't afford to pay for her car insurance on the car I bought her. so I sent her the bill.  My nephews birthday was the other day he turned 26 I called him and wished him Happy Birthday, he asked if I was coming in for birthday dinner, I told him I didn't know there was going to be one, Well I found out he had asked Mom to tell me about it but she didn't..she did the same thing with one of my good friends surprise Bday party she went, I didn't cause I didn't know about it, ( this was my high school friend) So my reflection, is that my Mom is not the kind of person that I need in my support circle, it isn't just this instance, but many many others that are very similiar, this year I had surgery for Cancer on my face I asked for her help, But she said No that she would be bored to death just having to take care of me, same thing happened years ago when I had knee surgery , I had her pick me up from hospital, asked her to get my prescriptions filled she said she didn't want to go into store, she made me do it I was on crutches all doped up,extreme pain, but that didn't matter to her. So why does it take so long to take off our rose colored glasses. Why have I let myself fall prey to this again and again. I'm still trying to figure that one out. Hoping to find my way thru this maze they call life...