push through it - this is going to be hard
So I just got back from the doctor. As I suspected, I'm not responding as well to the medication as he would like. He said that although I may be feeling some improvement, I should be feeling much better than I currently am. He suggested a couple of things:
There's a health food supplement he gave me that is supposed to help with the production of the MAO's in my system like serotonin. He also suggested that I up the dose of Nuvigil that I've been taking - for a day or two. He said the nice thing about Nuvigil is that I will be able to tell the same day if going up in dose helps me feel more energized/brighter. If that doesn't work, he's given me a prescription for a small dose of Ritalin, which he says sometimes can help people who have trouble responding to their meds get going. He's also prescribed a bunch of blood tests to see if I'm low in B12 which may be causing a problem. I'm also to up the amount of liothyrinine that I'm on for my thyroid - back up to twice a day. Lastly, and this is the hard one, he wants me to push myself harder. He said to do it in a gentle way, but to push just a bit more than I am now.
He is talking about getting more exercise (he even mentioned 5 miles of walking!!) and making sure I set the alarm rather than just letting my body get up of its own accord. He says I've been sleeping too much and when you sleep too much, your body slows down and goes into a hibernative state. Once I'm up, he says I should make sure to get out there and exercise and just do things. He talks about how in the psychiatric wards of hospitals, no matter how depressed you are, they don't let the patients sleep in. They get up, have breakfast, make their beds, go to group, do some crafts, maybe take a nap before lunch, then they have therapy and more tasks... Basically, even if the task is mundane, just to keep moving and doing something to get your brain moving again.
I guess I was worried that he would say what he did - that I need to push a little harder. At the same time, he wasn't getting down on me, he was just saying that since I asked, yes, I could be pushing myself a bit harder, but to remember to do it in a kind and gentle way. Meaning, if I can't do something and it feels like just too much, not to beat myself up. The important things is to try.
Fair enough - I know that everything I've read about depression talks about managing your eating, sleeping and exercise as some of the first things you need to do. He is managing my medication and that's all he can do from his end. I have to manage the other parts of my health. He can't do it for me.
Sigh. This is going to be hard. If I haven't taken a walk by myself, how am I supposed to walk every day and up to 5 miles!?? I am going to have to take it one step at a time, literally.
Tomorrow, I will set my alarm for 9 hours of sleep. That's what he said I should be getting tops. Then maybe I will get up and figure out a list of things to do for the day. This is going to be hard...
What I do like about my doctor is that he is aggressive in treating my depression. When he sees me and I'm not operating at 100 percent, he tries to think of the best next steps we can take so that I'm feeling better. I guess I am just disappointed in my body that it's not responding to the higher dose of the medication better. From what I remember, my body used to respond very well to medication. I guess there's no point in feeling badly about what I can't change.
I am going to need to figure out how to find the resolve to make the changes my doctor thinks I should be pushing myself toward...
There's a health food supplement he gave me that is supposed to help with the production of the MAO's in my system like serotonin. He also suggested that I up the dose of Nuvigil that I've been taking - for a day or two. He said the nice thing about Nuvigil is that I will be able to tell the same day if going up in dose helps me feel more energized/brighter. If that doesn't work, he's given me a prescription for a small dose of Ritalin, which he says sometimes can help people who have trouble responding to their meds get going. He's also prescribed a bunch of blood tests to see if I'm low in B12 which may be causing a problem. I'm also to up the amount of liothyrinine that I'm on for my thyroid - back up to twice a day. Lastly, and this is the hard one, he wants me to push myself harder. He said to do it in a gentle way, but to push just a bit more than I am now.
He is talking about getting more exercise (he even mentioned 5 miles of walking!!) and making sure I set the alarm rather than just letting my body get up of its own accord. He says I've been sleeping too much and when you sleep too much, your body slows down and goes into a hibernative state. Once I'm up, he says I should make sure to get out there and exercise and just do things. He talks about how in the psychiatric wards of hospitals, no matter how depressed you are, they don't let the patients sleep in. They get up, have breakfast, make their beds, go to group, do some crafts, maybe take a nap before lunch, then they have therapy and more tasks... Basically, even if the task is mundane, just to keep moving and doing something to get your brain moving again.
I guess I was worried that he would say what he did - that I need to push a little harder. At the same time, he wasn't getting down on me, he was just saying that since I asked, yes, I could be pushing myself a bit harder, but to remember to do it in a kind and gentle way. Meaning, if I can't do something and it feels like just too much, not to beat myself up. The important things is to try.
Fair enough - I know that everything I've read about depression talks about managing your eating, sleeping and exercise as some of the first things you need to do. He is managing my medication and that's all he can do from his end. I have to manage the other parts of my health. He can't do it for me.
Sigh. This is going to be hard. If I haven't taken a walk by myself, how am I supposed to walk every day and up to 5 miles!?? I am going to have to take it one step at a time, literally.
Tomorrow, I will set my alarm for 9 hours of sleep. That's what he said I should be getting tops. Then maybe I will get up and figure out a list of things to do for the day. This is going to be hard...
What I do like about my doctor is that he is aggressive in treating my depression. When he sees me and I'm not operating at 100 percent, he tries to think of the best next steps we can take so that I'm feeling better. I guess I am just disappointed in my body that it's not responding to the higher dose of the medication better. From what I remember, my body used to respond very well to medication. I guess there's no point in feeling badly about what I can't change.
I am going to need to figure out how to find the resolve to make the changes my doctor thinks I should be pushing myself toward...
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