puddin' head

I don't know what to write...I suppose sometimes I am searching for truths

to live by...and yes to each of us our own point of reference is a truth

and yet also at least for me we all need to focus on survival.

So I am sitting here - was sitting here this morning - and I did all my chores - 

coffee shop - made the bed- dressed - showered - washed dishes and then watched the CBS

Sunday morning show - and I then sat down on the couch and found myself spinning

about what to do next...I knew where I wish I could be - 

but wondered how I could make 'right here and now' - and I thought about life answers -

like if I lived in a religious community - the structure of the day would be pretty much 

prescribed and then my outlook would be managing myself within that structure -

or even if I just attended a church - there would be all that kind of stuff and demand

that the community would have and so give structure.

I have a zoom call at 10am - and then I'll go for a walk around the horse park...

My mind wants answers all the time - like to see a form and fill it...

I guess what I am realizing is that we've all got worries of life...all of us..

when alone or even together

and that makes sense - what would life be if it weren't empty in some ways

and so then we have the opportunities to fill it up? ... worrying doesn't make you

a bad person or somehow in danger or have a flaw! This idea is helping me engage

with others' worries as well!

Peace!

Mark