Please pray.
Tonight I feel desperately alone. I have had some victories lately, but I just feel like no matter what happens, I keep sinking back into this depression. I hate it. I hate being alone. I hate feeling like I can't be understood or loved. I know it's a lie, in my mind. But my heart feels wounded, ugly and unloveable. I want to trust the Lord and in HIs perfect plan and timing, but I don't know how. I feel hopelesss, helpless. Physical pain doesn't help. Yesterday I went to the ER because of massive amounts of pain in my arm, due to what I now know is cervical radiculopathy. I'm just so frustrated and angry. I don't want to hurt like this. I don't want to miss out on the things I love because of stupid pain like this, pain that's now affecting my daily life.
I know all of the stupid cliche things, like it takes time to heal, and this is just a season. But it's happening. It's real. And I hate it. And I hate that I feel so desperately alone.
Please pray for me. I don't know what else I can do. Nothing, really, except wait and pray. I just want this desperation to end. I am by no means considering taking my own life, so please don't worry about that. Just please, pray for me.
I know all of the stupid cliche things, like it takes time to heal, and this is just a season. But it's happening. It's real. And I hate it. And I hate that I feel so desperately alone.
Please pray for me. I don't know what else I can do. Nothing, really, except wait and pray. I just want this desperation to end. I am by no means considering taking my own life, so please don't worry about that. Just please, pray for me.
Replies
I\'m praying for you. I\'m so sorry that you are struggling, it\'s a terribly hard battle you are facing and it can be made even more difficult when you can\'t see an end to your suffering in the near future because of how endless the pain feels. It might feel difficult to believe in the plans of God when you are suffering so much, but you need to remember all the times your faith has aided you and use it as a little crutch to help you actively help yourself if you can. I\'ll be thinking of you and wishing you all the best. Let me know if you need to talk.