plan for the weekend.

https://www.facebook.com/bigcatrescue/videos/458975228144177

watched this video from a BIG CAT RESCUE. So interesting and fascinating.

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What am I going to do this weekend? Hang out - take care of what's needed to be taken

care of - I can keep this status in mind - - and I am doing alright and yet I am also 

becoming aware of my status of not having social plans aka having things to do.

I am not drinking alcohol but by not having a real plan of action for my time alone - the tempation of drinking alcohol - surely promises to takes away the responsibility of occupying myself with some action.

Blotto - just a soupy state of mind - and time passes without me really knowing or caring..

in any case or event - spending time alone really challenges the value - of my time...

It's hard to keep track - it's pushing me into a morass of feeling - a challenge to constantly adjust and accommodate

for myself with no real interaction outside of my cat and texts and emails with others...I'm not complaining -

it's what I chose to do - but it's kind of showing to me that it's not a healthy thing -

kind of seqeustering myself away from socializing until now - not believing

in myself I suppose - but I am ok now -  I want to have plans now.

So after this journal, I'll reach out to a friend.