Pissed the F*#k off!!!

I woke up this morning feeling sad about my current situation, being a separation/divorce. After countless hours of googling information about coping and handling divorce and how to win your spouse back I found that writing a letter to her could be something good, but not a letter about how much I love her or how much I miss her but a letter to let her know about how I understood how she viewed certain things that I did to anger her, I simply wanted to let her know that for ex. that after working 8-10 hours on her feet and coming home and finding me sitting on my ass expecting her to cook and clean or for her to ask me to throw the trash and let it sit for a day or two longer, which was stupid of me to do. Why is it that we find clarity of what we could have done after the fact that it's all gone to shit now? I'm angry because I put my heart and soul into that letter to really sit there and think about what I did to make her upset and view all the little things in her perspective, I text her to see if I can deliver it to her and she tells me to take it to her work and give it to one of her friends, so I say fine I will do that. Well when i get to her job and ask for her friend, I get her store manager instead and she comes up and tells me that I'm banned from her job because my soon to be ex-wife told her boss that she feels unsafe with me around and that I've been harassing her, WTF! I calmy apologized to her boss that I meant no disrespect to her business but that it was the 1st time I had been up there since my wife surprised me with the "I don't love you" speech. I f*cking angry that she would do that, I'm angry that now in this small town I'm being thought of as a wife beater, a stalker, and a harasser, I thought I knew my wife very well but now I think she's mentally unstable. I've never given her any reason to fear me and now she's scared of me, I've never raised my hand to her in 8 years and now she's telling people I tried to hit her. I'm so angry right now, up until 3.5 weeks ago I was trying to fight for this relationship and now I just wanna go and file the divorce myself, how could someone I lived with for 8 years just turn so f*cking crazy on me?

Replies

hurtinandhealin2560
hurtinandhealin2560

At this point, you really need to step back and maintain No Contact. I know you are hurting terribly, but you are in the position where she can file charges against you.

I glad you handled the situation calmly at the store. Keep the text where she told you to drop the letter off at the store. It may come in handy if she decides to file a restraining order.

Please do back off from her right now. I would hate to see you get in legal hot water over this. If you need to vent, call friends and family or talk to us here, but do not contact her in any way, not by text, phone, email, letter, nothing.

No amount of talking to her is going to make her change her mind. It sounds like she is done. Time for you to contact a counselor to help you cope with your feelings, and perhaps an attorney to see what your legal rights are.

I\'m really sorry you\'re hurting; many of us here know exactly how you feel. You have been blindsided. Continue to reach out here for comfort. We really do understand.