Pensive
This was going to be a short note. Fat chance! I just feel like writing my feelings. Ignore if you wish.
Joe and I both agreed that this was the best Christmas we've had since Lisa died. Our small family got to spend time together. We had turkey dinner, on Wednesday, and croquettes on Thursday. We came hope from Edmonton on Thursday afternoon. Cevyn went back home on Christmas Day. It didn't feel like Christmas Day anymore because we had ours on Wednesday!
We watched Cevyn go through security. We smiled and waved. When she disappeared toward the gate, I dissolved in tears.
I knew I would be really down, so I kept busy all day. My neighbour and I took a turkey dinner to an elderly lady at a nursing home. We also dragged our husbands along. Then I came home and made appetizers for our Christmas dinner with the neighbours. I was so busy, I forgot to make the eggnog I had promised! Dang. I make a really decadent eggnog.
Today is a bit of a downer. It was 6 years ago today that we had our memorial for Lisa in Red Deer, the city where she grew up. I remember that day well. When Joe went to do the eulogy, the sound system went a bit bonkers. I know it was Lisa letting us know she was there.
I have been watching the news. I feel just terrible about the bizarre weather all over the place. I worry about the people who are in the areas where there are fires, floods and tornadoes. The city where Joe grew up in England is under water. I am hoping his aunt is okay. His cousin lives higher up so should be okay. We emailed her but have not heard back. We have friends in Australia, hopefully not near the fires! And my dear SOTH who live in the South. The devastation is heartbreaking. I hope all in the affected areas are safe.
So that is it for now. New Years should be less emotional as we never really celebrated - it was not a real family day. But it does remind us that time passes. It reminds us that our children are gone and we are no longer able to hug them and hear their voices. That void just seems a bit bigger at this time of year.
Wishing all my SOTH a new year filled with love, peace and joy.
Lisa: We had such a wonderful Christmas with Cevyn. We hope she does decide to come and live here. She is such a special person. I love her to bits. She entertained the neighbours, her friends and us by mixing cocktails the night before she flew out. She is pretty good at it! It was so much fun - but as always we missed you. I miss you always and love you forever, Mummy
Joe and I both agreed that this was the best Christmas we've had since Lisa died. Our small family got to spend time together. We had turkey dinner, on Wednesday, and croquettes on Thursday. We came hope from Edmonton on Thursday afternoon. Cevyn went back home on Christmas Day. It didn't feel like Christmas Day anymore because we had ours on Wednesday!
We watched Cevyn go through security. We smiled and waved. When she disappeared toward the gate, I dissolved in tears.
I knew I would be really down, so I kept busy all day. My neighbour and I took a turkey dinner to an elderly lady at a nursing home. We also dragged our husbands along. Then I came home and made appetizers for our Christmas dinner with the neighbours. I was so busy, I forgot to make the eggnog I had promised! Dang. I make a really decadent eggnog.
Today is a bit of a downer. It was 6 years ago today that we had our memorial for Lisa in Red Deer, the city where she grew up. I remember that day well. When Joe went to do the eulogy, the sound system went a bit bonkers. I know it was Lisa letting us know she was there.
I have been watching the news. I feel just terrible about the bizarre weather all over the place. I worry about the people who are in the areas where there are fires, floods and tornadoes. The city where Joe grew up in England is under water. I am hoping his aunt is okay. His cousin lives higher up so should be okay. We emailed her but have not heard back. We have friends in Australia, hopefully not near the fires! And my dear SOTH who live in the South. The devastation is heartbreaking. I hope all in the affected areas are safe.
So that is it for now. New Years should be less emotional as we never really celebrated - it was not a real family day. But it does remind us that time passes. It reminds us that our children are gone and we are no longer able to hug them and hear their voices. That void just seems a bit bigger at this time of year.
Wishing all my SOTH a new year filled with love, peace and joy.
Lisa: We had such a wonderful Christmas with Cevyn. We hope she does decide to come and live here. She is such a special person. I love her to bits. She entertained the neighbours, her friends and us by mixing cocktails the night before she flew out. She is pretty good at it! It was so much fun - but as always we missed you. I miss you always and love you forever, Mummy
Replies
That is a wonderful journal. I am so glad that your holiday was filled with joy and happiness. I know that Lisa was watching and happy for you as well. Hugs to you and your family.
no eggnog !! OH my!!! my uncle always made that,,,, I was too young to have any but the adults used to laugh...... make some for new years... glad you had nice visit with Cevyn,,,,love ya!
What a great journal. I\'m so glad you had a lovely Christmas.
Here\'s to a peaceful 2016. My house has been anything but peaceful the last 7 days but come New Year\'s it will be. I\'m ready for it.
Marlene, I like hearing about your feelings so I didn\'t want to ignore! Sounds like you had a nice holiday and I am so glad. Since we traveled much of this journey together, I find healing in your healing. I smiled when you spoke of Lisa\'s memorial and the sound system. Josh made himself known through electronics too, like the telephone and the computer. Sounds like your time with Cevyn was wonderful. It must be rewarding to watch her grow up. It is so nice to hear about your holiday time.
Sending love,
Leda
So happy that you had a happy holiday time. I am still in Texas and not too far from Garland, where the tornado hit.It was scarey in Little Elm, close to Dallas. Sirens sounding off, lightning, driving rain and high winds. Flash floods still a danger in some places.Hoping to be able to drive home tomorrow. I am so glad you got to have quality time with Cevyn :)
(((((HUGS))))), Julia
This must have been the \"year\" for more peace filled holiday time for many of us as I have been reading that from many. It was for us as well and the gratitude I feel around that is beyond words.
I was certainly thinking of you with your Cevyn and know that you enjoy one another so very much. It will be interesting to see how her life continues to unfold and she knows she has Joe and you in her corner and what a gift that IS.
Gentle care as you reflect and switching things up I am finding at holiday time is working for us and it feels as if that is how it was for you as well.
Wish I could have had a tasty treat or two and a cocktail made by Cevyn. :)
I enjoyed your journal and your sharing how you are doing and feeling. It matters as do YOU!
With love,
XO Joanie
Hi Marlene,
Glad you had a good Christmas 1 day early! Sorry about the eggnog. Our son, Jared, made some for the extended family get- together on Christmas Eve. According to what we were told, it really went FAST!!!
Hope Cevyn will move near you very soon!
Love,
Donna
I am glad that your Christmas was so good. I hope you have a hundred more, each one exceeding the last.
Marlene, I love hearing about your happenings, thoughts and feelings. So glad Christmas was a good one. And keeping busy helps me too especially when the letdown and reality begin to \"kick in.\"
May your new year be filled with peace and love. Love to you and Lisa, Linda
So happy for you and Joe!!! Peace, Kathy
I love this journal, sweet Marlene! I an sure that it was a joy to see Cevyn. She is such a lovely person. XOXO Peace. Belinda
Believe it or not, I have never, in my 45 years, even just stayed up to see in a New Year. So New Years isn\'t a problem for me either, lol.
Christmas sounded good, I hope your Cevyn moves in or very close to you. I get it without the grandies life just isn\'t as fun. Keep your chin up always time for eggnog with or without the good stuff in it LOL
tight hugs
Penny
What a wonderful gift your time with Cevyn is! I am so glad you have an ongoing, really close bond with her and interesting, your comment to Lisa about her possibly moving west at some point? Hmmm!
I too have been thinking of the incredible devastation with mother nature in so many parts of our world and thinking of how lucky we are here (both you and I). Hoping everyone stays safe.
Hoping your New Years comes in with calm, thank you for sharing.
love you,
Merrilee