Panic Attack.

I am writing now on the edge of having a panic attack. I am hoping the need to hold things together to type will hold it off. My eyes are watering, I feel like screaming, My heart is beating a million miles a minute. I'm having a hard time catching my breath. My throat is dry. My hands are shaking. I feel like all the acid in my stomach is trying to climb up out of my throat.
I got a call that my dad who is in a rest home with Alzheimer's is having a fever and aching and they are taking him to the hospital. I'm not sure if he needs hospital but I guess they can't take any chances. So they called paramedics. They said they were taking him to Kaiser Permanente where he has insurance. I went there about ten minutes after they said he had left and waited for a half hour and he never showed up. I called the home and they said they told them to take him there and it has been over 40 minutes since he left the home and it is only a 25 minute ride at most.
I called the home back and they don't know what is going on but said they would call the paramedics and find out where they took him. I'm waiting for the call now.
I am supposed to be over at my sister's staying with her. I called her and told her I may not be over till later. Now I don't know what is happening and what I am supposed to do. It seems that everyone is asking me to do everything for everyone and I have to watch and take care of it all. I can't find any rest it seems for  more than a few days to bring myself back to OK before something else happens and I'm pushed back down again.
I just got the call saying he is at Kaiser.
Writing this did help, it passed the time needed to get the cal land kept me form completely losing it. Now I have to get back in the care and go out to the hospital again. I really hate my life right now.