Pain relief and Hospice

After 48 hours, we are beginning to see some decrease in pain for Bob. The continuous dosing of morphine helps, and there were some adjustments made to the dosage on Friday. We've had 3 visits from Hospice workers within the last 3 days; the first was the admission and the placing of the PCA pump. The second was the physical assessment for admission, and they changed the PICC line dressing and modified the morphine dose. Yesterday, PT stopped by to work with Bob for his neck pain. Bob is so relieved that there seems to be muscle strain in his neck/shoulder and there are exercises and icing that can be done to alleviate this pain. :)Today I'm intending to move the bed out of our bedroom, to make way for the hospital bed. As much as I think it will help, it's a step that is very hard to take. As is the hospice admission. I know that this is the direction we are heading, and have been heading for the longest time, it's just a hard step. Accepted a meal from a friend at work yesterday. It was amazing, just to know that someone had prepared that to help us out. I guess that's hard for me to accept, I've always thought I should be able to do it all, and have been self-sufficient. I like to be on the helping end of things, rather than the receiving end. God will have to work in me on that one, to accept other's blessings with grace, knowing that is how He intended us to live in community. Struggling with the work commitment now. Will talk to Bob today, and want to talk with someone at work tomorrow, to try to cut back in my responsibility there. My daughter's leaving to go back to college today, and she has been helping out around the house so much that I don't know what I'll do without her. Praying for God's direction and peace. The hardest part is not knowing the direction or speed of things to come. I know that this week we will have more people from hospice coming in to work with us, and I should be there for that. I was grateful that I didn't miss the nursing admission on Friday, which I thought I would. Each of those admissions has taken at least 2 hours, and PT was here for an hour yesterday. It is a good idea for me to be around, as Bob is not remembering as much, because of the medications. Went to sleep with a headache, woke up at 3 with a headache. I'm not doing too well with sleep these days. Things to be thankful for: some relief of pain for Bob, the PT assessment and possibility of some relief from the neck pain, a meal prepared by a friend, good communication with Rachel, and so much more.Thank you God, for your hand in each day, as we walk step by step through this cancer journey. I am so grateful that you are a God who will never leave us nor forsake us. You are the strong tower; you are my strength and my song.