Our children
I guess this has been the most painful week of my life. I hurt when my parents died but this has consumed me. As parents we want to help our children with anything and everthing but this is something I CAN'T help with.
Last Tuesday morning my youngest daughter and the mother of Mallory called and said Mama I am outside, can you let me in. Of course I knew immediately that something was really wrong! I jumped up and ran to the door and she just fell into my arms crying. Her husband has been cheating on her!! She was in a fetal position for days. She had no idea and the only way she found out was he confessed to her only hours before the womans husband called. I did not know that my heart was capable of such hate. We have raged, cried and I thought I was going to have to sit on Steve to keep him from taking a ballbat to his head. My Steve does not need this stress so I have had to calm down to keep his somewhat calm.
The story does not end there. After 2 days he has come crawling back, crying, blubbering and asking for forgiveness. He is so sorry and he tells her he will do anything, make a list of things he will follow it to the letter. HE will go to seek professional help. He has not left her alone to let her grieve him. Living at his mothers only across the yard!! My daughter is so hurt and betrayed!!
I don't know what she will do, but today Mallory is running a fever of 104 and has the flu! She was out of work all week last week and so HE is home with the daughter and his mother is a nurse so they are taking care of her. I can't go over there because I can't see his face yet, will I ever if she forgives him?
I can't risk bringing the flu to Steve.
I tell you this my DS friends because I want you to pray for my daughter and Mallory. We have agreed to support her decision and I pray that Gods will be done.
Thank you for listening. Wanda
Last Tuesday morning my youngest daughter and the mother of Mallory called and said Mama I am outside, can you let me in. Of course I knew immediately that something was really wrong! I jumped up and ran to the door and she just fell into my arms crying. Her husband has been cheating on her!! She was in a fetal position for days. She had no idea and the only way she found out was he confessed to her only hours before the womans husband called. I did not know that my heart was capable of such hate. We have raged, cried and I thought I was going to have to sit on Steve to keep him from taking a ballbat to his head. My Steve does not need this stress so I have had to calm down to keep his somewhat calm.
The story does not end there. After 2 days he has come crawling back, crying, blubbering and asking for forgiveness. He is so sorry and he tells her he will do anything, make a list of things he will follow it to the letter. HE will go to seek professional help. He has not left her alone to let her grieve him. Living at his mothers only across the yard!! My daughter is so hurt and betrayed!!
I don't know what she will do, but today Mallory is running a fever of 104 and has the flu! She was out of work all week last week and so HE is home with the daughter and his mother is a nurse so they are taking care of her. I can't go over there because I can't see his face yet, will I ever if she forgives him?
I can't risk bringing the flu to Steve.
I tell you this my DS friends because I want you to pray for my daughter and Mallory. We have agreed to support her decision and I pray that Gods will be done.
Thank you for listening. Wanda
Replies
I\'ll be praying for your daughter and Mallory. It is so hard to see our adult kids in pain. It\'s wonderful that you will be supportive of her decision!
Love & hugs,
Lois
Wanda, I am so sorry your family is going through this. I will pray for you Daughter and your granddaughter. Just be there for your daughter, which I know you will, and help her deal with her broken heart. As for the husband, he needs to back off and let her deal with this. He should have thought about the consequences before he cheated!
Sending LOTS of HUGS your way (((((Hugs)))))
Love, Carrie
Wanda, I don\'t know quite what to say...all I hope is that your daughter makes the right decision that she knows she can live with. Having a husband cheat on you and taking them back is one of the hardest things to do because of the trust issues. My first husband cheated on me and confessed as well...I lived with this knowledge for many more years and finally left because I just couldn\'t love or trust him anymore...and if I hadn\'t left him I would have never met my soul mate and the person that showed me what real love was all about...I know how it feels to have a daughter in pain...my younger daughter went through a divorce...help her through..Hugs Ellen
Wanda, I\'m so srry for your family pain. I hope your daughter make the best decision for her and your granddaughter. what ever it is just support her. Maybe she can find some councling that help her think (talk) it out someone not attached, maybe somene through her church. just a thought. lifes hard but when its our children that are in pain its even harder. I will add your daughter and granddaughter to my prayers. Hugs&Prayers to all your family, Love to you and Steve, please take care, Donna
Dear Wanda, I am keeping you and your family in my prayers. It has to be so difficult to watch your children suffer this way. I think if your daughter wants to consider taking this man back, they will both need some counseling....trust has been completely broken and it will take a long time to rebuild. I\'d probably stay seperated for a period of time for her to have appropriate time to consider her feelings. Love and best wishes to you all. Linda
Prayers to you, what a sad day for all involved. I hope things work out.
Thank you everyone for your comments. I so appreciate your prayers. I will honor her decision and stand by her. I want to castrate him. Time will tell.
Love you all,
Wanda
Hello Sweet Wanda,
I hate to hear about this. Can only imagine how broken hearted your precious daughter is. As a mom, I can relate to you wanted to castrate him! I, too, will be praying for all of you. I love you, dear friend.
Huge Hug,
Ingrid
I understand Steve wanting to bash him . Sounds like he only cofessed because he had no choice what a jerk !
Your poor daughter and grand daughter .Love and Prayers , Pam
Nothing I can say will take the pain away. Just know that your support for your daughter and grand daughter is what they need. No matter what your daughter decides to do she needs your support. Hugs and Prayers
This is such a horrible situation and I am sorry to hear of it. All of your DS friends are here for you, myself included. ~Christi
Wanda, sweetheart, I am so sorry for you all that this has happened. We can relate to the grief, shock and anger that you and Steve are going through. This happened with our youngest daughter just almost two years ago. We did exactly what you are doing - told her she had our support whatever decision she made. Her divorce is going to court this month.
I think, no matter that our children are adults, they are still \"our babies\" and when they\'re heartbroken, so are we. My heart goes out to, Wanda love. Remember I\'m here if you want to talk.
Love, hugs and strength
Angel xx
Oh my dear Wanda, you message brings flash backs to 7 years ago when our son came to the door the same way. My son 6 ft 3 fell to the floor crying about his wife cheating on him. I did not think we could ever get past that, and she was such a manitplating person, she did not want him but did not want anyone else to have him. She runined several relationships he tried to get in. Finally about 3-4 years ago he told her off and he takes nothing off her. It does take a long time, and we grit our teeth when or if we have to see her, since she is the Mom to our sweet grandboys. I pray that your daughter makes the right decision... Many many prayers, Annette
Dear Wanda,
I know you are hurting for your daughter right now, and may not even be looking for advice.....but know that as we here support each other through the trials of illness, we support you through the other trials life deals out.
TRY to stay out of it if you can - temper your anger toward him with love and kindness for your two girls - daughter and granddaughter- and know that as always, \"This too shall pass\". Be there for them, but don\'t noodle into the details. TRY to stay neutral. Take it from one who has been there - myself and my kids. And remember - and tell her too - it isn\'t cancer.
Good luck. Gloria
Hey Carol, Steve wanted to beat him around with a ballbat, but we have settled down and will support her in whatever decision she makes. I will never trust his ass ever again! He is Mallory\'s Dad so I know not to say anything about him around her. I may forgive but I will NEVER forget!