One week

I broke up with F. I thought that she was ok with but she wasn't. She hates me, she says that I hurt her and experimented with her and that I should have never kissed her or hugged her. After reading some of my entries here, I realize that I did wanted things to work between F and I. I tried, I really tried and even when I had to break up with her I was kind and nice and made up a stupid story for her not to feel bad. It didn't work but I did try, I did many things wrong but I tried to make things right. I'm really sorry, I wish I hadn't hurt her.
After feeling like a worm for so long, I'm finally starting to feel a little better. I don't want to toy with people ever again. Maybe I did toy with her, maybe I am a monster but I hate being this person, I have to change. I will change. No more porn, no more sickness, no mor desperation for love, I want to make things right from now on.