One Month

This is not the anniversary I was looking forward to celebrating this year. This day is so much harder than I anticipated it being. I'm trying hard to focus on work, but its so difficult. He is literally on my mind 24/7 and I constantly feel like crying. But since I am working I would look pretty crazy crying at my desk, although everyone knows so I'm sure they would understand. But the bigger thing is he would be so mad at me if I did and let it get in the way of my work. He use to get so upset with me when I was late for work or trying to talk to him about something during the day that could wait. He was the hardest worker I've ever met and worked even past the point he should have, had we had known he had a heart problem I'm sure he would not have worked as long as he did as hard as he did. He took a lot of pride in his work and was always very supportive of me and always pushed me to do better. That's one of the many reasons I fell in love with him. If it weren't for him I'd probably still be working in the restaurant we met in making next to nothing. Instead I'm in a good position with a fantastic company, no longer working hourly wages, and with plenty of room to advance myself. Its all because of him. I just wish it wasn't so hard right now.