ok, i am going to start in a new direction

I have realized that when I come home from work I tend to turn on the tv and basically pray to the big tv god in the sky( hehe). I mean I use it like a wedge to lean on - and deal with my downtime, my empty time away from work and family. I think I owe myself something more than this. Yesterday I noticed that when I didn't have a sense what to do - on goes the tv or food in the mouth. I am going to find something that I like and beat that drum until maybe I make some music or realize I like another drum to beat. :)

I had been going to Buddhism Meditation classes - but I lost my nerve a little after a few days away from it. I get paranoid but I can't buy into that just yet. I will go back there tomorrow.

Also todoay in about half an hour, I am going to meet my sister's boyfriend at a Rock Climbing Gym. So outta shape

here and my back hurts - but I am going to try it. Anything new it seems I go all sheepish and want to stay home and watch TV. Going to push my A$$ out the door. :)