Off work today.
Yesterday I was so eager to start my counseling. I know that it would not be a miracle answer and they can't tell me what to do but they can help me decide to make the best decision for me. Yesterday during work I was breaking down crying it seemed like every 30 minutes or so. I figured having another day off would help me.Very hard to stay focused. Then after work I drove to the school park me and my husband had met and I did a little more sobbing. I can't believe how much this situation has shown me how much I do love him.
Counseling went well. I am so glad I took that step. Its hard because my ins. don't cover it. But my sanity is important to keep:) Also I want to give my marriage every opportunity to work even if I don't have the money I will find it. Thank God I found a place that will base it on my income.
The counseling confirmed to me that the emotions I am dealing with are all normal for the situation at hand. This is good because I truly felt as though I was loosing my mind. I have also realized that I need to do for me. I want to be the best person I can be no matter what happens to my marriage. I am gong to (try) to focus on the future and not live and dwell on the past. The past is only painful. Well we will see how that goes:) Positive thinking! No more checking out the OW on her myspace or facebook because it brings no positive at all.....Maybe I will even put up the Christmas tree. I usually do that over Thanksgiving weekend but with being the week I found out about the affair I didn't care about anything.
But after I came home last night it was such a good feeling seeing my husband home from work and we just laid on the bed holding one another for the rest of the night. So my day couldn't have ended better.
Thanks for listening....This journal so helps me:)
Counseling went well. I am so glad I took that step. Its hard because my ins. don't cover it. But my sanity is important to keep:) Also I want to give my marriage every opportunity to work even if I don't have the money I will find it. Thank God I found a place that will base it on my income.
The counseling confirmed to me that the emotions I am dealing with are all normal for the situation at hand. This is good because I truly felt as though I was loosing my mind. I have also realized that I need to do for me. I want to be the best person I can be no matter what happens to my marriage. I am gong to (try) to focus on the future and not live and dwell on the past. The past is only painful. Well we will see how that goes:) Positive thinking! No more checking out the OW on her myspace or facebook because it brings no positive at all.....Maybe I will even put up the Christmas tree. I usually do that over Thanksgiving weekend but with being the week I found out about the affair I didn't care about anything.
But after I came home last night it was such a good feeling seeing my husband home from work and we just laid on the bed holding one another for the rest of the night. So my day couldn't have ended better.
Thanks for listening....This journal so helps me:)
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