Now We Wait.
When your dreams come true, it's an intense emotion. I honestly don't believe there's a word to describe it. It's this rush of relief, excitement, sadness, and skepticism all at once.
General Update: My ex left her girlfriend, and moved back to town. And now we're "seeing" each other. Not dating, but that's okay. I mean, she JUST broke up with her last girlfriend. Although what we've had going has been going on for MONTHS, we've agreed to take our time.
I can't help but be impatient. I just don't like not knowing what's going to happen. How can you date someone you used to live with? Automatically we're SUPER comfortable around each other. A lot of the awkwardness of dating is gone. And it's hard because it's so easy to stay the night with each other.
My head says, "Take your time. She's not going anywhere." But my heart says "It's been 3 months! You're moving at the perfect pace. Tell her you love her! You didn't think she'd go anywhere before, and she did." So I'm in a constant battle with myself about what I SHOULD be doing and what I WANT to do.
So far, I've just tried to be honest with her and communicate about what I'm feeling. Hopefully, that's enough for now.
What I DO know, is that holding her feels unreal. Kissing her is just how I've always pictured it. And I spent MONTHS imagining what I would do if we ever got to make love again. So getting these chances again is...unbelievable. I wake up not knowing if it's a dream or if it's real. Seeing those red curls cascading around my pillows is the best thing I could ever wake up to.
General Update: My ex left her girlfriend, and moved back to town. And now we're "seeing" each other. Not dating, but that's okay. I mean, she JUST broke up with her last girlfriend. Although what we've had going has been going on for MONTHS, we've agreed to take our time.
I can't help but be impatient. I just don't like not knowing what's going to happen. How can you date someone you used to live with? Automatically we're SUPER comfortable around each other. A lot of the awkwardness of dating is gone. And it's hard because it's so easy to stay the night with each other.
My head says, "Take your time. She's not going anywhere." But my heart says "It's been 3 months! You're moving at the perfect pace. Tell her you love her! You didn't think she'd go anywhere before, and she did." So I'm in a constant battle with myself about what I SHOULD be doing and what I WANT to do.
So far, I've just tried to be honest with her and communicate about what I'm feeling. Hopefully, that's enough for now.
What I DO know, is that holding her feels unreal. Kissing her is just how I've always pictured it. And I spent MONTHS imagining what I would do if we ever got to make love again. So getting these chances again is...unbelievable. I wake up not knowing if it's a dream or if it's real. Seeing those red curls cascading around my pillows is the best thing I could ever wake up to.
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