Note to Self. . .
Note to self. . . do not volunteer to host any more family gatherings for at least 3 months!!!!
I had entirely too much face time with my dear MIL this weekend. A friend of hers (and someone also close to DH) is currently in a nursing/rehab facility because he is dying of cancer. I have met him only 1-2 times, as he has been ill most of the time DH and I have been together. MIL has been trying to visit often and DH wanted to go to show his support and possibly say good-bye etc. I went along despite the fact that I was a little apprehensive since I don't know him well. MIL drove the 45 mins to facility and when we get there completely clams up; I mean the only questions she could seem to ask the poor man were about tests and pain etc. It was really brutal. I felt horrible because I can only imagine being him and not wanting to dwell on the inevitable, and just wanting to feel "normal." I ended up carrying the conversation for 90 minutes until he needed to rest. I felt good about doing it because he seemed like he really needed the distraction; however I was slightly annoyed at MIL for not uttering one word while there! On the way home she said she was glad that we came because she usually has nothing to say to him! Wow. This was Saturday and after visiting she insists on going out to eat with us because she is famished, and then lets us pick up the tab because she has no cash.
Then on Sunday I was supposed to host Easter dinner. MIL again is in attendance along with DH's 93 yr old grandma. (Now this is the part that really put me over the edge and probably ruined the rest of the day for me.) Despite the fact that DH and I are in our 30's she still makes us Easter baskets every year (she says she will stop when she gets grandkids). She usually puts in mostly candy and dollar store junk, but this year she got creative. . . wait for it, wait for it. . . I got pink baby scrapbooking stickers. When I held them up with a puzzled (probably moe like bamboozled) look on my face she says, "they were just so cute I had to buy them. And you will probably use them eventually, right?" (Insert expectant look here) I was officially rendered speechless and quickly made some excuse to get back in the kitchen to my cooking.
After everyone left I had a talk with DH. (he had been convieniently absent during the "sticker incident") I told him that I was sick of his mom rubbing that fact that we are still childless in my face and that I would not be spending any long periods of time with her again in the near future. I really let loose and went on and on about how I went along with her to visit her dying friend and yet she still finds the need to point out every baby, baby item or baby website etc. etc. DH was stunned and said that he had not really noticed how much my MIL had been picking at the baby issue, and that I was right to be upset. Whew.
I am just so disappointed in MIL, as she has had 2 MC in the past. It just amazes me that she can be so completely tactless. . .
Sorry about venting, but that felt better!!
I had entirely too much face time with my dear MIL this weekend. A friend of hers (and someone also close to DH) is currently in a nursing/rehab facility because he is dying of cancer. I have met him only 1-2 times, as he has been ill most of the time DH and I have been together. MIL has been trying to visit often and DH wanted to go to show his support and possibly say good-bye etc. I went along despite the fact that I was a little apprehensive since I don't know him well. MIL drove the 45 mins to facility and when we get there completely clams up; I mean the only questions she could seem to ask the poor man were about tests and pain etc. It was really brutal. I felt horrible because I can only imagine being him and not wanting to dwell on the inevitable, and just wanting to feel "normal." I ended up carrying the conversation for 90 minutes until he needed to rest. I felt good about doing it because he seemed like he really needed the distraction; however I was slightly annoyed at MIL for not uttering one word while there! On the way home she said she was glad that we came because she usually has nothing to say to him! Wow. This was Saturday and after visiting she insists on going out to eat with us because she is famished, and then lets us pick up the tab because she has no cash.
Then on Sunday I was supposed to host Easter dinner. MIL again is in attendance along with DH's 93 yr old grandma. (Now this is the part that really put me over the edge and probably ruined the rest of the day for me.) Despite the fact that DH and I are in our 30's she still makes us Easter baskets every year (she says she will stop when she gets grandkids). She usually puts in mostly candy and dollar store junk, but this year she got creative. . . wait for it, wait for it. . . I got pink baby scrapbooking stickers. When I held them up with a puzzled (probably moe like bamboozled) look on my face she says, "they were just so cute I had to buy them. And you will probably use them eventually, right?" (Insert expectant look here) I was officially rendered speechless and quickly made some excuse to get back in the kitchen to my cooking.
After everyone left I had a talk with DH. (he had been convieniently absent during the "sticker incident") I told him that I was sick of his mom rubbing that fact that we are still childless in my face and that I would not be spending any long periods of time with her again in the near future. I really let loose and went on and on about how I went along with her to visit her dying friend and yet she still finds the need to point out every baby, baby item or baby website etc. etc. DH was stunned and said that he had not really noticed how much my MIL had been picking at the baby issue, and that I was right to be upset. Whew.
I am just so disappointed in MIL, as she has had 2 MC in the past. It just amazes me that she can be so completely tactless. . .
Sorry about venting, but that felt better!!
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