not to be alone

I am starting to be ok with seeing the process of my life as being the main focus to keep.

I also have started to think about the idea of having someone in my life... I am facing the solitude

and I wonder about having someone to

be with - but I am concerned that I tend to not think past my own ideal of how I would like

my life to be - and what I would want that other person to be in my life. Sorry if this is too

weird or self involved. But I think I have to realistically question or think about that idea

of sharing my life with someone - and how I would have to compromise on how they would

like things - in addition to how I would like to have things. I have been alone for so many years

I think perhaps I may not have the nature to share a life with - I have become so settled

about my life that I think the anxiousness that might come with sharing a life might deter me from

the success of it...but I can't recoil because of fear of failure -I must try it - Perhaps moreso I should

try to be social at first - and that would be very welcome indeed. More social at first is what I will seek.

What I am seeing too is that having some anxiousness in life is to be expected and so I can apply that

to my forsight.