Not so happy birthday to me...

Birthdays... umm.. Is that day when you celebrate one more year of being alive..Is that day everyone tells you how special you are..
Actually, it's an EGO day. You get presents, and congratulations, for actually doing nothing special for a year... 
And for me, well birthdays are awful. I just hate this day... It's just not a good day for my ED. It triggers it A LOT!! It's a day where everyone (even the people I don't like or haven't hear from since last year)'s hypocritically "HAPPY" for me, while I'm drowning in a depression that no one cares about. Then it's a day were all those happy people, want you to be happy... WELL, WHAT IF I DON'T WANT TO BE EFFIN SMILING TODAY?!, I never do, so what's so special today to do so.  And then, it's a day full of FOOD!! ALL DAY LONG?! Why can't people "celebrate" something without it? I have to eat in front of friends for breakfast, eat in front of my family at lunch, and eat in front of other friends at dinner... LOTS AMOUNTS OF FOOD!! It's like a Christmas or New year's eve, where there is lots of food there looking at you and you have to eat it.. so not good for me... I guess I'll just end up purging to end my birthday... what a nice way to end it.. 
So yeah, it's been 21 years since I was born...Just another not so special day in my life...