not doing well on my goal

well, i dont know what it is with me especially latly. at first wene i first lost my job, i realy had way moor confedence than i do right now. i feel  just horible. i feel like a peice of old garbagge. son just left for a day so i can finnally have the place to myself. im starting to realy doubt my self worth. if only i could get some bills paid without having to beg. esspecial to my boyfriend. he is supposed to love me. im just very scared right now... not doing well on my goal, maybe better tommorow....