not doing well

Doing very badly - decided I would go to a GA meeting again.  I know what's right and what I'm supposed to be doing but this monster takes over.  The only way I can conquer it is with some help; though this site is great, I'm very sad tonight and realize that I can't do it without something else. Maybe it's GA...  I'm totally disgusted with myself and the way I have given in to this.. I have a great life and don't need to ruin it over something like this ridiculous addiction.   I am finally admitting i"m powerless over this! I absolutely give up trying to control it and will go to the next meeting in town and let you guys know how it is. 
I'm sorry i have let myself down and others that had great faith in me and the fact that I was doing great. I have great support in you guys and I'm just sick over it and am actually so stessed right now I am feeling a pain in my chest and a monumental headache . .  so will go and get some rest if possible.
SG