nobody's perfect
i have been with my siblings and my Aunts from New York this week (after work during the days) and I have to say that it feels like I just can't deal with much anymore. I kind of just tried to be subdued and respectful because I didn't have much to offer and was afraid to put a foot wrong. I love them but just not much to say.We laughed and made jokes at times more yesterday than today - I added to it - but I think they 'get' that I kind of can't deal at times. My brother in law and sister were so masterful
at entertaining the Aunts and kept the conversation flowing. I get kind of fatigued and go subdued.
it seems like as I age I am starting to see who I actually am and when I am alone my vanity tells me something else. That I have more value than seems when I am around others - maybe I will take it in stride - that yeah.. nobody's perfect and I am not perfectÂ
-maybe my creative projects when I am alone will be my focus rather than stirring the pot by complaining. I tried to go to sleep right now- but there's was a force in me that kind of had to get it out.
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Replies
Sounds like you were anticipating problems, but then you say that you were laughing, telling jokes; I guess I'm confused. I've been with people and get tired too.
People are different, even when they're family...or should I say, especially when they're family?!
Your sense of self with changing values is heartfelt, I am sure. Your metamorphosis is showing!