No tea party this year

     I am a bit depressed about my state of mind, and the condition of my faith.  My symptoms have not been any better.  I have been feeling less bloated although not completely well.  The worst thing right now is the fatigue on Saturday and Sunday I was utterly exhausted.  Worn out and beyond tired.  Today I have been fatigued not as bad as S & S but bad.  It started me thinking about going to see the doctor and telling them how I have been feeling.  I wanted to wait at least a week, to see if it would go away by itself, but as usual I am starting to freak out.  What is wrong with me? I am afraid to go to the doctor, because they may find something, but I am also afraid they will find nothing and I will go on in pain and fatigue always wondering and guessing.        There will be no tea party this year at my church, I loved the annual tea party.  But my church is slowly dying, members are dropping off and it can barely support itself anymore.  I don't want to have to find a new church, I love the teaching and the people at this church.  It is very depressing.   The condition of my faith is also depressing, I think I am doing better but then I hit a bump in the road and I am back to square one scared and fearful.  I know God is here for me but I am still sad and scared.   Well I need to go to bed but I am going to try to wait on going to the doctor for a couple of days.