no magical thinking
I am just coming to see how if I feel like I don't percieve I have control of an outcome, say
with the pursuit of my paintings - I tend to shut down... and shut it off...I can't do
that anymore...there are no guarentees no matter how you slice it - hard work and moving
in your efforts forward are what it takes.
Replies
Alanon's 3rd step was a long, mean and tedious step for me. Hand over my will and Life? ? ? Not unless I have the right to bite off the hand trying to take ^it^ from me over my bloody corpse! ! ! Get your cultist rhetoric out of my ear canals! ! !
A decade or three of yaddah blahs later found me calling ^it^ control freakitis and still unable to hand over my will and my life to the higher power of my understanding. "God" is as good a name as any. Gnarly Old Dickhead for my long-winded days. A brother-in-healing shared how he was having better luck with giving up the ***illusion*** of control. Attempting to give up control was feeding his delusion that he ever had been in control. He was finding it easier to give up the illusion than to feed the delusion.
At least, I think that is what he said. Should I worry about my sanity because his spiel made enough sense to me that I was able to make it my own? Now to be able to say ^it^ sensibly. Gnarly Old Dickhead knows I can't trust my memory, though even there there are no guarantees. Even *I* get one right every now and again.
steady as she goes arfie, I'll stick to the pragmatic and even so, me and all, we all get wins even if it's being given the will
and the chance to carry forward!! eh??? : )
Amen.
Let every day be a brand new beginning.