New start
I've made a lot of job applications in the last few weeks. No interviews yet but yesterday I applied for the one that I think is the best fit, I could do everything on their essential list and most on their desirable list. I dare to feel a little positive about it, but then I found myself thinking of the children and my wife and I get so depressed. They've a total loser for husband, soon to be former, and dad. I tried talking to mum about the job, over lunch, and I was halfway through a sentence when she decided lunch was over and she was going back to her chair in the lounge. Thank goodness for this journal, and the few people who keep in touch. I do find writing is good, which is just as well as the job I've applied for is a writer's job.
Replies
Focus on what you are doing for your well-being.
Excellent, hope you get the job.
Change the way you approach the feelings with your children. You are their dad, and what you do and say makes a difference in how they think of you. The change in your relationship with your wife just means that relationship is separate, as you both remain the children's parents, so keep it civil, positive, and know that the more you do to put your life into a better balance, the easier it will be to move through this change.
Your mum knows that you are applying for jobs. Just write it out. Keep it simple with your mum. She's there for you, and in her own way, is working out the changes, the challenges, and sometimes, the support is that quiet works to keep the mind from overloading with thoughts.
And, talk is one thing, doing is another.
Yes, I think I've got to remember that she's going through various things, others are supporting her, she's on the phone at the moment to someone, she tends to talk - stroke made writing a challenge - whereas I've always written things down. So many words buzz around my head and I enjoy choosing them and putting them down. I'll have to put it to her I've got an interview then the next stage, she's better with facts than possibilities. I went for a walk today and realised that, whilst the writers job doesn't pay as well as some of the other jobs, it is the one I really want. Walking helps me as well and I'm now doing that daily!