Needing advice
I was just wondering if you all had any advice for medication. I went to a clinic about a month ago and she prescribed citalopram. I tried it for about two weeks but it left me with more anxiety and I woke up feeling like I haven't slept at all. A lot of medications seem to have the opposite effect on me. And between losing Robert, then being in three accidents, it seems my anxiety level is very high. Most nights, I lay in bed for hours crying before I go to sleep. Then wake up very early, like now. I've been up since 3:30. I want something that will have an immediate effect, not something that will take weeks or months to work. But I don't want to be going to the doctor and him thinking I'm just looking for drugs. What, if anything, have you all tried that worked? With the first anniversary of Robert's death coming up, I find myself feeling more and more anxious. All day yesterday, I just had this feeling of impending doom and so much sadness. And I get so tired of trying to be strong and putting on this brave front when I go out in public. And it seems like the anxiety is at it's worst on Monday mornings, when I have to go back to work and drive. What should I do?
Replies
Hi Penny, I have taken Zoloft since about a year after Ed passed. I felt a change in about 5 days after starting it. It helps me to manage the sadness so I don\'t cry at work or while driving. It is a serotonin reuptake inhibitor anti-depressant, doesn\'t cause weight gain and is not addictive. For me, it helps. I was on Citalpram
Sorry, my phone is very sensitive and so here is the rest of my comment lol. When Eddie first died I was on Citalopram too. I was on the smallest dosage but I had to cut them in half. They were too strong for me.I was also concerned because they can be addictive. So after a few months I went off of them after speaking to my doctor. At about a year into this horrible journey I decided to try the antidepressant and it has been helpful for me. I would explore some options with your doctor and settle on what works best for you. Gentle hugs and just know your profound sadness is part of this walk but sometimes meds can help us to function a bit better. Love to you and Robert, Linda
My mom takes effector. Same issues you have since my dad was killed. I had anxiety and panic attacks after a lady hit me in her car, I was a pedestrian in the crosswalk! I was paralyzed by panic for years, finally it resided and stopped. I was on Zoloft and xanax at that time. That\'s been on over 6 years ago...I am panic and medication free now. For me I believe it was mentally dealing with it, getting over the \"what if it happens again\". I really changed the way I thought about it. I have a permanent back injury, but it\'s not as bad as being locked in my mind. I can chance dying by getting out and driving and living life or live miserable by my own unrational fear. Hugs to you, I know it is not easy in any sense, hope you get some relief soon.
I\'ve been on Zoloft(Setraline) and Remeron(Mirtazapine) and that combination has helped me especially with anxiety. I went off the Remeron about 8 months ago, but have decided that I\'m not doing as well as when I was taking it and I\'m going back on in as soon as the prescription comes in the mail.
Unfortunately though it does takes months for both Zoloft and Remeron to be fully affected though there is some benefit within a few days.
This is a hard decision because the lost of a loved one is not a disease but it hurts so bad, we need relief. It\'s and intimate decision and there is no right or wrong, only what works for you.
Tight hugs,
Terry
Penny there are people who tend to have reverse effects from medication. My husband is one of them. The fact that you recognize this is very helpful in your care. Your Dr. needs to be made aware of it also. This could have a bearing on how to best help you.
I also take Zoloft. Even though I think it is used for depression it can also be effective with anxiety, which is why I take it. It works for me but everyone is different so what works for 1 person may not work for another. It can take some time ( a couple weeks or so) to see which work well for you. The fast acting meds can tend to be the addictive ones, like Zanax. They can even be dangerous for someone to overdose on. I was prescribed Zanax as needed for panic attacks, which worked well, but made me fearful too. Both of my sons passed away from accidental prescription med overdose. One of the meds was Methadone & the other was Klonopin ( which I think is along the lines of Zanax but a little stronger). I was super careful & would only take 1 maybe every couple days, then 1 a week or so.
For me I believe the medication is only part of my healing. Talk therapy is just as important. I would highly recommend therapy & your Dr. can determine if adding medication would also be helpful.
This can be a difficult decision to make. I will keep you in my prayers that you find something safe & effective to help you. Hugs of understanding.....Vicki
Penny, for the most part I have not had anxiety but my car wreck was in 1976. (Dave crashed his vehicle twice while the pain was so fresh. He only takes blood pressure meds.) Since I was on Klonopin already, that may be the reason for not having panic attacks or anxiety. Impending doom and sadness sounds more like depression, but of course I am not an expert. I am on Wellbutrin and Prozac and I don\'t know if they are working or not. It does not feel like it. I don\'t know what I need!
You are still \"young in your loss\" so I think a lot of this is just natural. I thank God that I did not have the ability to work, even before Josh died. Sounds ironic to say such a thing.....
Sending love your way,
Leda
Penny, I haven\'t tried any antidepressents, but am very happy with Ambien. Obviously, it would just help you with sleeping, not how you feel when you are awake, but maybe something that would let you actually get to sleep and stay asleep might be helpful also? Good luck in figuring out what works. Laura
I have not taken any meds, yet the numbness in my life is so hard to cope with. I am afraid of being too dependent on them. I am working on a positive outlook by reading, mediation and pray. Some days it really does work. It is a process for sure. One day at a time. Peace and hoping you can get some sleep. Love, Kathy
Penny, There are a host of different antidepressants out there. Just because citalopram did not work for you is no reason to believe none will. Now my pharmacist side is coming out: Talk to your doctor and explain how the citalopram is not working and that you want to try a different antidepressant (zoloft = sertraline is one that works for many people). Also talk about your sleeping issues. Don\'t be afraid to explain how this all started and what your needs are now. I started on an antidepressant (zoloft) and xanax for anxiety in the first year after Vanessa died. I weaned myself off the xanax over the following year and also stopped the antidepressant in the 2nd year. (You see, pharmacists hate taking drugs!) It was not easy for me, but what I noticed most was how much I was NOT feeling because of the antidepressant. I needed and wanted to \"numb\" myself at first, but over time I realized I was not reacting emotionally to anything and that was my cue to start weaning off the antidepressant. They are not addictive, but do alter your moods (both high and low).
It is not unusual to feel greater anxiety as the anniversary comes closer. It was a major issue for me the1st, 2nd, 3rd, oh heck, all of the anniversaries for me. I went to a grief counselor for about a year after Vanessa died that was extremely helpful for me. She truly cared and listened! I also learned to use some relaxation techniques and took up yoga that keeps my anxiety under control.
It has been 5 years, 6 month and 20 days since I lost my daughter in a car accident. You will never forget this horrible experience, but you will grow stronger again, I promise.
Be gentle with yourself and don\'t demand too much, especially as the anniversary approaches. You will find yourself going through some extreme emotions, but it is all part of the healing we all go through. We are here for you and so deeply understand the depression, fear, anxiety and loss of purpose that comes along this journey. Trust me, hope will return to your life and you will become strong again with Robert watching over you forever! Hugs, Amber
HI PENNY I TAKE PROZAC AND XANAX I HAVE FOR YEARS . I HAVE TERRIBLE AANXIETY ,PANIC, PTS. XANAX IS ADDICTIVE ALMOST ALL DRUGS TO CALM OR RELAX YOU ARE ADDICTIVE. BUT IT IS EASY TO WEAN YOUR SELF OFF THEM IF YOU WANT YOUR DR. WOULD HELP YOU NOT HARD NO REAL BAD EFFECTS. I THINK XANAX IS A GREAT DRUG, BLESS YOUR ANGEL LOVE MARY ANN
I have taken a few different antidepressants I am on Vibbyd now it has seemed to work very well for me, I don\'t have the anxiety as much as some do. I do believe in acupuncture it has been around for thousands of years, It has worked well with my daughters anxiety it did very well with my mirgrains . At this point see if it works if not move on to something else.
Hugs Penny