Nearing 36 still no baby

Been trying since about 2005 to be a mom and here it is Almost 2014 and still with all I have been through   I am still no closer. My heart aches and I am completely lost. seriously I can't imagine my life to be different and it shouldn't be like this! I am trying with all my heart to stay hopeful, but in this moment I am  drowning in despair! Tomorrow will be better!