My Niece=My heart!

Today has actually been a pretty good day!! I only had one anxiety attack and I was able to calm myself down pretty quickly! I've spent the day with my niece who just turned three!!! Her and her lil brother are a big part of the reason I am still here and keep pushing. I love them with all of my heart, when I'm with them nothing else matters, they bring me pure joy!! They're my lil angel babies!!! But now they left to join one of my cousins daughters birthday, bbq, drinks, family and friends. But like always my agoraphobia held me back and here I am sitting at home wishing I could join in on the fun. Normally I would go and drink (tends to help cope with my anxiety when I'm out) But I've decided after losing my grandma, and 2 of my aunts to sclerosis of the liver and now having one of my cousins in ICU right now from sclerosis (which btw is prob another reason why my anxiety has been super high) I'm sick of watching alcohol kill my family and I will no longer be apart of that. I'm just thankful I spent most of the day with my niece on her birthday. I continue to think positive and pray for my cousins healing. Positive, Positive, Positive!! Gotta keep up the positive vibes!!! As for the rest of my day, I guess I'll cuddle up to my furrbaby and watch some Netflix. ♥