My Husbands funeral

I'm getting ready to go to my husband's funeral.  The peace I felt last night after the viewing has been replaced by more tears.  I so wish this hadn't happened.  I guess this is the big finale, the event that tells me definitively, in no uncertain terms, that yes, he has passed.  It's really hard to deal with.  I hope I don't burst into tears while reading the eulogy that I prepared for him.  Things got mixed up in the planning, and I never got any announcements in the paper.  There are a few people coming,but I couldn't locate most of his close friends, and his family all live in another province.   At some point in the future, I may have a celebration of life gathering at our home for his friends who may want to pay their respects.  We'll see.  Here's a link to his eulogy...
http://deepeningdarness.blogspot.ca/