My Father, and Me.

     This is just a general update, I guess.  My dad is still in the hospital and probably will be until sunday.  Then he will be moving into my house.  My brother says that he can no longer live with him. I am going to ask my dad to move in he doesn't know that my brother doesn't want him to live with him anymore and I am afraid it will hurt him horribly.  I pray he will accept my offer and not let his pride get in the way. I know it will be difficult to live with my father again but this time maybe it will be different.  My 56 year old father seems so much older then he is, he looks in his sixties. He looks so sad and worn down.  It makes me very sad and anxious.  I understand the sadness but my anxiety has thrown me for a bit of a loop.  I have been sooooooo tired the last couple of days, and the nausea is still there.  This afternoon I was so tired I thought I was going fall asleep in the car on the way to see my dad.  And once I got to the hospital, I had the complete opposite reaction I had a surge of anxiety, and felt all anxious like I was in the midst of an anxiety attack, but up until that point I had not been anxious. I felt amped and shaky, like I was just trying to maintain.   My husband says my emotions have been shut down and that now they are trying to come out.  He may be right.  I have felt shut down emotionally since I learned that my dad had been hospitalized. I pray for his recovery and I pray for my peace of mind.