Hello it's been awhile since I went on this site. So much has happened. My Luis has been gone 5 years so hard to believe. Things are better now, I sold the house we had built over a year ago and moved to another area. I am retired now and I was taking care of my mom but, had to unfortunately put her into a Nursing home her dementia was out of control when I moved her. I feel guilty about that because she was happy in my old house and going to an adult daycare where she had friends. Once I moved she was more confused than ever I feel horrible I see her everyday her dementia has doubled sometimes she knows me sometime she doesn't I cannot converse with her she seems to ramble on about things that makes no sense. She is going to be 95 I am blessed to have her this long. All I can do is visit her and hug her and love her forever. I do miss her because I am alone now. I do have family in this area that is why I moved. Things are better for me with my grief from the loss of my beloved Luis. A year after he passed my dog also passed. I now suffer from anxiety and it's hard to control it. I am so afraid of Xanax. I pray and meditate and listen to soft music which helps. I am fortunate to have a lot of family here and friends I cannot complain. I go out quite a bit and I also take care of my granddaughter once a week so I don't feel too alone. God is me with that I know. Okay hope everyone is better. I will check in every now and then. Well this is the update God bless all.