morning cat wailing

Blue and I woke up this morning at around 330am.

He cuddled on my belly and 

I dozed with the tv 'on and off' until about 5am.

Then I watched a show and had my breakfast and tea in bed.

As the sun started to come up, Blue started wailing "primally."

I wasn't sure what his issue was - but I imagined it was the early

morning 'rise and shine energy' that had him reeling for entertainment

and wild cat adventure, that he wasn't finding in my one bedroom apartment.

I decided to offer him the cat whip and he loved it!

He was super agressive about attacking it and then after a while

I took him out to the balcony to watch the wild life. We saw a bunny,

a sparrow, a squirrel and a crow. He was super focused and loves

sitting out there with me...I can't let him off my lap out there as he would very easily fall

through the railings.

We came back inside and Blue started wailing again. This time by his food bowl.

I capitulated and gave him a small portion of food...small enough so that his portions

are now tiny each time..it seems like he likes to graze every 4 hours or so. He quieted down straight

away and life here is now moving along in peace again.

I was thinking about how awful my dreams were last night. Really depressing, 

suffocating and bad vibes. When I woke this morning, I had to grapple

with my sense of loss that I had just awakened from and make sense

of things about the morning and day ahead.

I did the normal routine of things and then Blue then started wailing, as I said, and so I had to

be creative about pleasing him. It seems that both he and I are alike.

We both can wail up to the skies at times about our needs, when they aren't

met. We both are left to our resources to try and effect a good solution and ultimately

if we cannot find something, both he and I start to reach out to others..but the lesson

for me is that I know I have own that.

I thought about how god provides for me in the form of his relationship

and as well as my relationships with others around me. I found myself seeing the activity,

of keeping Blue stimulated, was something god very much does for me in

any of the wonderful ways and relationships in my life. In doing this for Blue there was a sense

of good works done and reciprocation for that lil guy does for me.

As Blue has started to wail once again, I just resorted to keeping his mind

engaged - and I thought about the pressures we put on each other

to be what we need them to be at any time. I think though, not to sound

cliche', but again, it's a good labor of love to give to my dear Blue. He teaches me so much!

I'm kind of seeing the gray area of love and duty at times that's a part of taking care of someone.

So it's 637am - time to start the day. After those dreams last night I really need

to restore myself so that things get done.

They will!! :)