more cookies, alarm clock migraines and general venting

cookies in the oven.......cookies resting on racks.  feeling no particular joy this night as i do this......hot and sweaty, wanting it to be done.  no music on......not wanting to bend far enough to dig out the Christmas tunes.

grumpy major.....but still trying.  laundry waiting to be folded......fresh cat litter.....yes, Rio just for YOU!  freshly washed baking sheets drying on the dryer, since i haven't enough space for all the cookies, ingredients, racks and more.

we do what we can with what we have.......i had a weird dream.

i was going up the escalator when i spied a little dark haired boy with big brown eyes all by himself.  we locked eyes, next thing i know he is coming up the escalator after me, when we get to the top he throws himself at me......as if he knows i can be trusted, it's alright to trust me.  thank God of all the crazies wandering through dreams everywhere that he picked my arms......

but i have a very pressing matter, i have to go to the bathroom, so off we go into the Ladies Room.....when I get inside four people, two adult males and two adult females tackle me......i can't see the little boy anywhere, but i am praying for his safety.  i can't hear him either.......all i can hear are my own frantic pleas......let me up!  i have to get up, please let me up........oh my God let me up!!!!! 

i try over and over but that only serves to strengthen their hold on me.  their arms and hands are in this interlocking pattern that seems impossible to create and yet there it is holding me down.  i'm afraid for the child and i'm certain that i am about to wet my pants......i continue to cry out.....and then i rise

awake, no longer dreaming, my head is pounding like an unholy war.  it's a vice grip of some magnitude.  i really have to go....but i can't get up.  there is serious pressue in my forehead, at the back of my head, behind my ears......when i finally do get up i have to hold onto things, the furniture, the walls.  i feel pretty sure it was one of those alarm clock migraines.  they usually come with an intensely detailed clear dream......

i wash my face with cold water, then uncertain if that helped i get a washcloth and get it nice and warm.  press it to my head and wish for rain......a large tub of fresh rainwater to fall into.  something to ease the pain........sleep helps and hinders the healing at times.  sorry for letting it all hang out......but that's just me.  it's almost Christmas.  sam has already let me know that my plan to make sausage balls with pregrated cheese is SUBSTANDARD.......but i haven't heard anyone offer to come over and grate cheese to there  you have it.

hope to make them tomorrow sometime......they still taste really good to me.  night night.......hang in there.  love you!!!!!!!