More about my house
So Aaron has been gone from this earth for six months and on the 26th, it will be 7 months. I have not lived in my home this WHOLE time. I have lived with my parents. They take my boys to and from school, what my husband used to do and help me so much. Every Sunday I go to the house after church for a couple of hours, sometimes less than that. I have made a conscious effort to do this so that my parents have time away from the kids and so that the house isn't just abandoned. Sometimes I work in the house and other times I just watch tv. I have made a list of things that I want to get done there. Staying there the night, however, is not on the list.
My 10 year old son plays outside with his friends in the neighborhood. My 7 year old son, plays in his room. When I went this weekend, I looked at photo albums. Most of them, baby pictures of the kids. It was pleasant, actually.
I guess I feel confused, still, about what to do with my house. I do not feel comfortable enough to really live there...but feel some attachment to it. It was our home for 9 years. I want to move forward, but feel like I can't let go. My sister tells me that everyone in the neighborhood knows that no one lives there-even with my efforts of making it seem occupied. She thinks that someone will rob me. My emotions are making it hard to decide. She thinks that we should pack everything up and put it into a storage space. But then I wouldn't be able to visit...
My 10 year old son plays outside with his friends in the neighborhood. My 7 year old son, plays in his room. When I went this weekend, I looked at photo albums. Most of them, baby pictures of the kids. It was pleasant, actually.
I guess I feel confused, still, about what to do with my house. I do not feel comfortable enough to really live there...but feel some attachment to it. It was our home for 9 years. I want to move forward, but feel like I can't let go. My sister tells me that everyone in the neighborhood knows that no one lives there-even with my efforts of making it seem occupied. She thinks that someone will rob me. My emotions are making it hard to decide. She thinks that we should pack everything up and put it into a storage space. But then I wouldn't be able to visit...
Replies
This is no time to make a huge decision regarding that house. I suggest: do you know one of your neighbors well enough to ask him to be a \"caretaker\"? Just stop it every day, turn lights on and off, etc. for a small sum every month (I payed my neighbor $150 a month for three years but he also shoveled and plowed snow for me, let people in, re-set the alarm, etc.) If not, investigate alarms. All you really need is an alarm on back and front doors with a VERY LOUD SIREN and some window contacts for windows placed where someone might attempt to get in. These systems are for sale online but you must know how to install them or know someone who can. There are companies that will put in an alarm system such as this for free if you sign a ONE YEAR CONTRACT for monitoring the alarm. My house was (I just sold it) alarmed in this manner and after the first year I discontinued the contract. The alarm still sounds just as loud and the stickers identify the house as alarmed. Once in a while, you can set it off deliberately (especially in the evening) so the neighbors KNOW it is actually there.
I couldn\'t live in that house. You may yet be able to live in yours. Give this time. Proceed with caution. Never make any major decisions when in an emotional state that prevents \"good\" decisions and rejects \"bad\" decisions. Much love and peace.
I moved out of my house after my husbands death as well. I\'ve spent the night twice since then, and my son and I live with my mom and stepdad.. Moving back has been on my mind lately, but I\'m terrified. My sister rents the house, so luckil I have no responsibility besides the portion of the mortgage that she doesn\'t cover....