Monday, July 16, 2012
My Dearest Darling Darrell,
This morning I awoke, missing you as always. Today is the first anniversary of the death of the husband of one of my friends from the DS group, Nancy. (Strange how I always associated anniversaries with happy times. After you left, Honey, I knew how miserable some anniversaries truly can be.) I cried and cried thinking about Nancy and what she must be going through. I eventually sent her a message to let her know how sad I felt for her. She responded that she had been receiving phone calls and messages of support and that she was actually keeping positive thoughts. Her strength in the face of this adversity is inspiring. I can't imagine that I will ever have nearly such stamina when next Valentine's Day comes and I have to face the same thing. I know I shouldn't be looking so far into the future and I try to live each day as it comes, but sometimes it's JUST SO HARD. And, today is one of those sometimes.
I felt so good yesterday... I miss you so much and having your arms enfold me when I was hurt and broken and making things better. I certainly could use a sign from you to comfort me today...
Please be at peace, My Darling.
All my love,
Terry
This morning I awoke, missing you as always. Today is the first anniversary of the death of the husband of one of my friends from the DS group, Nancy. (Strange how I always associated anniversaries with happy times. After you left, Honey, I knew how miserable some anniversaries truly can be.) I cried and cried thinking about Nancy and what she must be going through. I eventually sent her a message to let her know how sad I felt for her. She responded that she had been receiving phone calls and messages of support and that she was actually keeping positive thoughts. Her strength in the face of this adversity is inspiring. I can't imagine that I will ever have nearly such stamina when next Valentine's Day comes and I have to face the same thing. I know I shouldn't be looking so far into the future and I try to live each day as it comes, but sometimes it's JUST SO HARD. And, today is one of those sometimes.
I felt so good yesterday... I miss you so much and having your arms enfold me when I was hurt and broken and making things better. I certainly could use a sign from you to comfort me today...
Please be at peace, My Darling.
All my love,
Terry
Replies
Teryy,
If I could be so bold...I think you ARE the sign from our loving Darrell already. I think the signs from him are right inside of you already. the way you have comapassion for all around you even in your own grief and hurt. The way you still have a sence of humor about yourself, and those moments that you share with us on the board everyday. The reaching out you do so effortlessly, the way you say what you measn and mean what you say.
You are a rare person, and one that I am already in awe of being so new to this journey yet so wise. I can\'t help but think that the love...the complete love you shared with this wonderful man that we come to know more everyday by knowing you......I don\'t think you could have a stronger sign of his impact on your life, and those you touch now that he is with you...he is PART OF YOU and you share it...pay it forward every single day with us here.
I wish I could send him back to you...if I could I would. I would do it for everyone here I holod so dear. But you are using his arms to hold others. A second at best, but what a second to have.
Love to you dear new friend and many tight hugs diane
Enfolded in his arms.loved that picture...........remember Norm putting his arms around me and saying...........you just fit perfectly........we do miss those intimate moments don\'t we.......................you\'re right..don\'t think too far ahead..........we know things change in a heartbeat.................I got a plot for us in a little Scandanavian Cemetery.....it has a little white church on the property just like the one where we got married...........and a headstone already engraved...................have Norm\'s ashes and will be co-mingled....his word.***
I have found that sometimes the anticipation of the anniversary is worse than the day.............so ohang on.keep the faith........and those precious memories....hugs.Lori