Monday Januay 16, 2012

I haven't written for a while, but going thru a rough patch and need to vent. My Dad, at 96 1/2, has been in the hospital for 10 days. I had a sinus infection and was not able to visit him until last Friday when he was so mean to me I walked out. He told me I am raising my kids wrong, they are 28 and 29, both married, own their own homes, and both teach high school. I told him he couldn't talk to me that way, nor could he verbally abuse me any more. I was very calm, said he could call me when he was able to speak to me nicely. He was to have gone to his apartment today, and all of a sudden he was told he could not get 24 hour care, that he thought was being supplied to him thru the hospital social worker, but 2 - 3 hours only per day. It was suggested he go into hospice. I know I am in shock about this decision, esp since I was not even aware it was being discussed. Dad will stay in the hospital until a bed becomes available. My brother is here until the end of January he lives half way around the world, then he'll be gone for me to look after "things'. My Dad's heart is failing, he is very weak, and in the past 3 weeks he has really gone down hill. Not helping is his "friend" that has driven a wedge between him and his family, all but my brother, my Dad does what she wants, he has chosen her, it is so damn sad. She told my Dad I tried to kill him on my daughter's wedding day.......this is what we are dealing with. I am made to feel guilty for pretty much everything. I was always there for my Mum and Dad and when my Mum passed away 4 years ago he was already in a 2 year relationship with this person. Sick sick sick. Thanks for listening.