Monday Jan. 21, 2019 - It was a good evening... Until...

Well, as it seems to be the case practically every day, and evening, earlier tonight started off nice enough but slowly and surely it fell apart into a confusing angry stand-off. That's the best way I can describe it because I honestly don't understand what his " problem " was tonight. I know he wasn't happy about how WWE RAW was going on the USA channel, but there have been plenty of other times that's happened, and he didn't take out his feelings about it on me, on those nights. Tonight though, as soon as the wrestling started going " downhill " he started giving me the " silent treatment ", and about every 5 to 10 minutes he would sigh, and fidget in his recliner chair. I repeatedly tried to ask him what was wrong, but he continued to barely give me an answer. The main answer I got back from him was that eating the pasta I cooked tonight for dinner didn't agree with him. I told him I was sorry to hear that. What else could I have said ? Nothing that I can see. Besides.... it was HIM that told me to cook the pasta for our dinner tonight ! HIM ! So in what universe was it FAIR at all for him to behave like he was angry at me for not feeling well from it ?!?!? 

Besides this... while we were watching WWE RAW the cable channel repeatedly showed an ad for the new show " Temptation Island ". He started laughing out loud at it, and he repeatedly called it several names. I agreed with him about the " names ", but I told him that I didn't think the concept of people getting together to " cheat " on their significant others was a " FUNNY " subject. Several times he tried to talk me into believing it is " FUNNY ", but I told him that I simply have a different opinion. 

What the sam hill is wrong with having a different opinion ?!... NOTHING !... 

I calmly tried to explain to him that 2 people can love each other dearly, and still have some different opinions about certain things. That doesn't mean that they love each other any less. They simply respect the fact that they are 2 different people - with the right to have different opinions - and leave it at that. 

I told him that my having a different opinion about the tv show being " funny " did NOT mean that I was mad at him at all. I explained to him that I fully understood that he feels the show is " funny ", but I still LOVE him just the same. 

I can't kick a sinking feeling right now that he didn't believe me.

He was very short when he left the living room to go lay down. He didn't say " Goodnight ", and made a point of leaving me his dirty dish from his cereal to take of... saying that " He did enough, and I could take care of it. " He sounded angry at me when he said it. I don't understand that... because I did NOTHING to deserve his anger tonight... NOTHING AT ALL !!!!!!!!!

Of course I took care of his dish, - at least as much as I could... ( I couldn't use the garbage disposal like I needed to for it, since 1 I couldn't reach it, and 2 it would have potentially woke him up. ".... so that part of things will have to be taken care of tomorrow morning. If I'm lucky... and he goes out to an A.A. meeting... I'll try to take care of it then.

Tomorrow I pray will be a MUCH better day than this evening was !!!!

PLEASE let it be MUCH BETTER GOD !!!

I'm hoping and praying that Ray will open up to me tomorrow, and explain why he was so quiet and anger-filled tonight !