mixed blessings
On my third 'tired-but-wired' day after a crappy week.
On Monday I had a barium enema. 3 hours plus and painful as heck. Of course I crashed mid stream, could barely walk by time it was done and totally wiped out the following day.
Wednesday I went to the doc for results and .. clean. No diverticulitis. no issues with the intettines or colon. Great..So we still don't know why my stomach has been swollen for 6 months and getting more painful by the day. We have explored 5 different diagnoses so far and each test has come back clean. FRUSTRATED!
My doc is at that place where he just looks hopeless and confused.. next.
Crashed again on my birthday, second year in a row. I am pissed!
After the test my body felt violated, my stomach literally felt as if the insides had been scraped with a serrated knife. I was on painkillers all the way back to Saturday when the pain finally started to subside.
Sunday I woke up wired and have been that way since. Getting about 4 hours of sleep per night, unable to switch off..of course I'm exhausted but sometimes BPD overrides CFS and I just have to roll with it.
I did have a good day yesterday and today which turned out to be a fruitless waste of time at the tile store (long story) was also a good one in terms of physical capacity. Am up waay past my bedtime, been watching music videos..really need some sleep.
After the disappointment of the test I had a bit of depressive slump but I am buoyed by a glimmer of hope. I have noticed for some weeks now that my body seems to be resting and repairing some when I do sleep. I am waking up feeling well. Alleluia! You know any day when one wakes up not feeling crappy is automatically a good day.
I usually wipe out within 30 mins but it gives me hope that maybe something in my body is heading in the right direction.
I am truly tired of being sick, I am tired of the constraints on my life.. I want to LIVE again.
On Monday I had a barium enema. 3 hours plus and painful as heck. Of course I crashed mid stream, could barely walk by time it was done and totally wiped out the following day.
Wednesday I went to the doc for results and .. clean. No diverticulitis. no issues with the intettines or colon. Great..So we still don't know why my stomach has been swollen for 6 months and getting more painful by the day. We have explored 5 different diagnoses so far and each test has come back clean. FRUSTRATED!
My doc is at that place where he just looks hopeless and confused.. next.
Crashed again on my birthday, second year in a row. I am pissed!
After the test my body felt violated, my stomach literally felt as if the insides had been scraped with a serrated knife. I was on painkillers all the way back to Saturday when the pain finally started to subside.
Sunday I woke up wired and have been that way since. Getting about 4 hours of sleep per night, unable to switch off..of course I'm exhausted but sometimes BPD overrides CFS and I just have to roll with it.
I did have a good day yesterday and today which turned out to be a fruitless waste of time at the tile store (long story) was also a good one in terms of physical capacity. Am up waay past my bedtime, been watching music videos..really need some sleep.
After the disappointment of the test I had a bit of depressive slump but I am buoyed by a glimmer of hope. I have noticed for some weeks now that my body seems to be resting and repairing some when I do sleep. I am waking up feeling well. Alleluia! You know any day when one wakes up not feeling crappy is automatically a good day.
I usually wipe out within 30 mins but it gives me hope that maybe something in my body is heading in the right direction.
I am truly tired of being sick, I am tired of the constraints on my life.. I want to LIVE again.
Replies
Hey Max, I guess that 30 mins of feeling good could be seen as a positive shift in energy, that may extend into longer periods.I thought a particular person was being sarcastic on the discussion page by saying that you were lucky and it was \"brilliant\"that you had energy for 30mins.I felt defensive for you, however now I can see they may have been genuinely positive . I\'m glad that your tests were clear, it is all a process of elimination.Hope you can catch up with some good sleeps soon, love Di
Hey when was your birthday????
Dec 12.. Since i was busy crashing on that day, i think i\'ll mark my calendar for a do over jan12 instead