mix up
things are going ok today. I didn't have anything planned today - and the habit of going online or watching tv is something I think is not worthy.. does that makes sense? So I went for a walk. I went for a coffee too. The non-structure can have me feeling a lot of disarray about what I ought to be doing - but I know it's just about doing what I like I suppose. My older sister suggested something really good and interesting. A visual diary. Draw a pic of your experience or whatever every day - it doesn't have to be good - but it will give me an outlet to think about things and create things in visual terms. I liked that idea and I have been doing it two days in a row now. I think it probably is everyone's 'mix up' to find what to do with themselves every day if they're not working at the moment. I guess that's pretty obvious as I read a lot of journals here- I guess it's just the anxiety I have to deal with and I guess we all have to deal with at times. I'll tell myself things don't have to be perfect and maybe that I should just enjoy "the lightness of being." It's a beautiful day - I'll enjoy it! You all have a good day!! :)
Replies
A visual diary sounds fun if you like to draw. Finding things to do with oneself when there is no work can be difficult, but it sounds like you are doing fine.
thanks becky! It's a good day!
things are making sense to me today. just took myself to the market and bought myself some specialty italian foods. came back to the house and enjoyed them. watching some tv now - and maybe will take myself for a walk later to get some exercise. Just grateful and relaxed. Not tense. I have freaked out when I think my life should be something more than it is - but I think I get that now. I will look at a computer coding book a friend reccomended. I liked doing that in junior high school. It might be something to follow up on.
I kind of get why I have been so conservative about where I go and what I do... I think it says a lot about my comfort level and anxiety. I think opting out of things is my way to deal with anxiety, I think I can do more!
I can relate with the anxiety issue. I hope you can, as you say, do more. Take it easy.
thanks becky.
A visual diary sounds like a terrific plan! Know what's nice too? You're in charge of you and your choices! Have a great weekend...plus.:)
thanks IWBD!!! :)