Missing those who have gone on

I miss all those who have gone on.  I have many people who have passed away like:   my dad, my two infant sisters, my mom, my older brother and the love of my life Smokey.  I miss them all so much.  I feel so alone.  I can't sleep and its 2:39 a.m.  I fell asleep too early at 8:30 p.m. and that is not my normal sleeping pattern.  I was so marose today.  My phone screwed up and I had to take it into Best Buy.  I got a new phone and plan, so what else is new.  I can't sleep so am missing all the people that have passed away in my life and there were many.  The older one becomes the more people pass away or so it seems.
Change is inevitable.  We can't stop change.  It happens when we lose the love of our lives or other people that we love.  We are here but they are not.  Its easy to give in to dispair, grief and depression. 
My older brother had Asperger's Syndrome but he was my best friend.  Smokey was the love of my life and my best best best friend ever in the world.  I miss them greatly.  No one can replace them that is for sure.
Some on Daily Strength have lost their partners, healed and were lucky enough to find someone new in their lives.  I was hoping it would happen to me but alas I am alone.  I am glad for Daily Strength.  I don't go on it as often as I used to when Smnokey died on November 15, 2009. 
Thanks for listening and just needing to vent at this early hour of the morning.
Missing my Smokey and my brother Don so very much from DB