Medication
I swear sometimes even with all the stuff I know about what I need to do to stay well, I make some not so smart decisions. I decided early in the summer to stop taking my meds (prozac) which timed things so that it would be out of my system completely now, right when I need to go back to work. The last few days I've really been able to feel that anxiety again. Like it can just come out of now where, like waves of it just washing onto me. i just get really jumpy and on edge, like little things that wouldn't normally bother me make me crazy. Soooo, I started taking it again. I will try to come off it next year again, but I'll time it better so that I start to taper earlier and have it out of my system early in the summer. Also I really have to do all the things that help my anxiety naturally (like moderate exercise, taking specific supplements recommended by Dr. Emmons, meditation, etc). I've been lazy about that this summer too, and have actually been worse about some things like my morning ritual of prayer and meditation. It's like when I have the structure of the school year I know I have to do it at a certain time, and everything is busy it has to happen then. In the summer I just get up and don't do it right away, and then the day gets away from me. I've also been isolating a bit, sometimes I just get in that mode where i don't want to be around anyone, and I know in my head that's when I do need to get out but then at times i just don't do what i know would be best. Like last night was game night with my group of friends that are all in AA. I love them, and we always have a great time, but I just didn't feel like going. I just keep thinking i need to get all this stuff done before school starts but then i don't end up doing half of it anyway. Oh well, it's one day at a time... I'm definitely grateful that i have such great people in my life, before i got sober i didn't have anyone, i need to make sure i'm showing up for them and not be disappearing.
I have went for a walk the last couple days and that was really nice. Also followed my plan from friday which was good, and got up today and did my readings, prayed and meditated. So today is off to a good start.
So some goals to keep it going that way for today:
* Get another walk in tonight
*Get one of my paperwork items done
*Get upstairs cleaned
*Talk to at least one AA/OA member today to get out of my own crazy head
*Do evening readings
Ok, that's good for now...hope everyone on DS has a good sunday!
I have went for a walk the last couple days and that was really nice. Also followed my plan from friday which was good, and got up today and did my readings, prayed and meditated. So today is off to a good start.
So some goals to keep it going that way for today:
* Get another walk in tonight
*Get one of my paperwork items done
*Get upstairs cleaned
*Talk to at least one AA/OA member today to get out of my own crazy head
*Do evening readings
Ok, that's good for now...hope everyone on DS has a good sunday!
Replies
that\'s pretty awesome, seems like you had a really good start to your day, I hope the rest of the day turned as planned, but even if not, dont take it too hard, if anything ever goes as planned its a miracle, so just that your morning went well is definitely something to be absolutely proud of!
I know exactly what you mean, when I was still at my old job, I used to miss evenings of movies, fun and all sorts, cause of deadlines, but instead of working I would end up doing rather unproductive things.. I would play games, go to sleep, watch youtube vids, absolutely anything except the work that needed to get done..
I found that I would not be able to do the work cause I was depressed, and anxious, then cause I wasn\'t able to do the work I would get so disappointed in myself and get even more depressed, its a vicious spiral.. dont let yourself get pulled into it, take hold of the small achievements in life when it feels like your not doing anything right, cause you can only do 10% of what you wanted, rather say I got 100% of my morning rituals down, it helps to compartmentalize it and to help bring your mood out, cause you know you still have that under your belt, you just gotta move onto the next compartment ;)
Just keep in mind you cant control everything, if something happens (even your mood changing) its ok, take that time for yourself, sometimes its good to hermitize (if thats a word haha)
Keeping you in my prayers!
Thanks so much for reading and responding! You have great advice, I definitely tend to go to extremes and be all or nothing so I definitely need to work on that. The whole control piece too its totally me (it\'s a big alcoholic type trait). Thanks for your prayers too they are very appreciated!
Dear Chelle, I did use this meds when I was severely anerexic. I know it really works. But will this meds make you to depend on it? It\'s good to have a walk after dinner since at night, it is easy to binge. Hope I can have a partner to walk together. Walking alone is just too boring.