made it past the year marker
Well I made it past yesterday. It was filled with tears and awful memories. It was almost like i was living it again. It made it fresh and I am as upset as I was last year. I am thinking do I have to relive last year all over again? Conrad was helpful but it was Margaret that actually remmebered it was the day I was told James died. I am so upset I am going to go off to bed and stay there. Hope you all have a happy new year.
Replies
One year is still so new & painful. Oh how I remember those times. Spending the day in bed may be best for you right now & that\'s ok. Could be part of taking gentle care of yourself. Sending hugs to let you know I understand...I care.
Love, Vicki
I completely understand. I stayed in bed and cried too. I have been told by those that have been there, that you have to do what gets you through.I have had many of those days in the last 20 months. Thinking of you and sending hugs of love and understanding.
I\'m sorry you have relived that awful day.
I hope tomorrow will be a better day.
I like to stay as busy as possible and have as many peeps around as I can.... we all do it different... the day comes and goes....glad yours has come and gone now.. love ya!
It is painful every year but it is most painful for the first few... I could not believe it could ever get better, but somehow it eases a bit.
Sending love,
Leda
You made it through and that is what matters... Each of us navigates these days in our own ways and for me I know that each year will feel different in some way because I am not the same. The one constant is always the deep missing and longing for those beautiful children of ours and the LOVE that will always be felt.
Be gentle with your war torn heart and bed sounds like just the place to BE for as awhile.
Loving care and SO much understanding,
XO Joanie
The first few years are not easy but as time goes by and the healing begins it will improve. Take it easy, do what you must to get through the rough spots. We are all here for each other,
Tight hugs Penny
Im so sorry for you and you are in my prayers. I went through this on
8-23-14 then on 9-3 which was Jacobs birthday. On his birthday we all
wrote messages on balloons and sent them up to him. I hope you find some
way to ease your pain, I slept a lot and cried. Hugs & Understanding
The first year I seemed to blindly function up to, through and past the anniversary of Jason\'s death. I was so grateful for the overwhelming numbness that surrounded me. What ever you do or don\'t do, is ok. I am coming up to the second year anniversary of Jason\'s death now - January 25th and I do not seem to possess the same amount of numbness.
We must allow ourselves to just be in whatever form that takes for each of us. This journey does not come with an instruction manual. Know that you are not alone. Know that others here have walked it before you and they will cushion your way. The day will come when you will be strong enough to reach out to others and be their cushion. And that\'s ok too.
Through tears and pain, you are not alone.
Merrilee
Thank you for your support. It helps to know I am not alone in this. I am sorry I don\'t write you individually and thank you. I just don\'t have the energy, but know I really need the support. Angela