Looked into the face of the devil tonight

For most of the evening tonight I felt we were having a " normal " - peaceful - time. We chatted about various things without ending up arguing about any of it. That was the case until one issue came up. It didn't have to be an " issue " if he had just listened to me, and been willing to compromise. But I should have known better. I should have known that the word compromise is simply not in his vocabulary. The " issue " was this - where to put the shelves from the bookcase that felt apart tonight. I suggested the closet by the apartment door, but he immediately vetoed that leaving no room for discussion over it. Instead he " told me " that he was going to put the wooden shelves underneath the bed in the bedroom. I don't like the idea of using the space under a bed as " storage ". It was something my mom was against, and I've always been against it - especially when I was married for 10 years to Bill. Besides it's obvious to me that once something is put underneath the bed, it'll pretty much be staying there for an undetermined amount of time. 

He could have done the " normal " thing, and took a few moments to ask me why I was so against putting them under the bed, but oh no... instead he jumped right from a normal tone of voice to a full-blown raging fit from hell !!!! 

Included in his raging fit over this simple issue, he threw a half full metal soda can at my face ! It hit the side of my nose, and my chin ! Plus since I was crying pretty much uncontrollably he screamed at me to stop crying ! Not trying to calm me down, but just demanding that I stop crying, or he would hurt me again ! Plus during all of his ranting he threatened to destroy everything I own here - my tv, computers, etc.. microwave.. etc.. In the bedroom it sounded like he was breaking one of the walls down ! I'm afraid to check on that today to see what - if any - damage he did in the bedroom. After making a point to go get wall repair stuff to do something about some of the nicks - etc - in the walls, it would be pretty stupid of him to create more of them ! But I won't know what happened - if anything - until I check it out later.

While all of this was happening... I stared off into space... silent... not saying anything at all to him as I contemplated why I took him back again ! I don't deserve this crap from him ... or from anyone !