living in the 'burbs

Today I am recognizing that I like living out here in the suburbs.

It's quiet and peaceful.

To capture what I am feeling I'll say that living

'out here', I am not reminded of all the things that I should be

like I would be if I were to be living in the city.

I used to live in the city of Los Angeles.

I had a flashy super decorated condo and art collection and all that is gone now

due to the havoc that my mental health challenges have created for me.

Recently when I have gone into the city and have experienced all the congestion

with people and traffic, plus the flashy signs and fashions galore...I've thought to myself

'I am so glad I don't live here anymore...'

Today I came home from work did my usual stuff and a couple of errands and then

came home where I snacked on some spiced cider and dried mango.

I kind of wondered what to do but what comes to me are two things or maybe three...

One is that I am supposed to be where I am in life due to the nature of my physical

and mental abilities...I'm not fighting my thoughts of how my life should be...

Two, I thought about what Rich said in terms of self pity...

Three, I thought about Arfie's theme song "Let it be.."

I've also been thinking about what my therapist talked about in terms of the

idea of "measuring up." I never really understood that before - but putting

that idea side by side with what I am thinking about now - I kind of see

a bit where she's coming from and I'll bring that up with her tomorrow.