little bits of heaven......here on earth

allow yourself a little bit of heaven.  so many flavors, colors.......choices.  Yes, even within the tiny space of a small life.....little bits of heaven.  Textures, scents......memories. 

turn on the music.......let it take over, drown out the beat of tedium.  toss humdrum boring on it's ear.......listen to the rhythm of the music.....as you cook tortiglioni in a boiling pot of water.

saute the goodness of the next few day's meals in the pan.......and let the music take you away.  let it please and soothe you....(i am listening to latin instrumental musica)....just when it seems life can't get any better the sounds of the string section play.......a richness that makes hips sway.....cheekbones lift as a smile takes hold.  happy right now. satisfied.

this pasta, tortiglioni, was first made in 1912.......antica pasta di gragnano in napoli,italy.  sounds luxurious.......but it was sitting there on sale right next to the bargain brand.  so here we are, this little bag of pasta......some spices, beef rich in protein.......and musica.  soft, pleasing.......sensuous.  turning an ordinary day.....one that began with tears into a better place.

little bits of heaven.  you don't have to go far.  you just have to let yourself go...............

take you away.  you, calgon......can still find a place to perch that takes you up and out of the pain.  the regret, the many unfulfilled wishes.  it can take you to this moment.  just this moment.  to savor, to inhale, to feel.........

i have this soft pale blue throw.  it reminds me of a loving hug ....... a giant teddy bear blankie that warms my toes right up to my chinny chin chin.  the washer has it's little bits of heaven......knocking bits of dirt and detritus off my cotton........and i have this music.  to fill me up........carry me ever upward. into the clouds......dancing on the clouds. join me.......twirling and dancing barefoot on those heavenly clouds overlooking the tiny far away earth.  we can have these little bits of heaven.  every single day.  permit yourself.......let go.  come with me, take my hand.

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so.......i spied this little doll.  standing on a shelf at a thrift store.  ten inches high......very old with a delicately faded hand painted face. moveable arms and legs......sturdy sweet girl with almost no hair.  just a few malignant strands adorning her pretty face.  i knew she must come home with me.  i am her newly adoptive mum.  this young lady is coming with me.....to have a life of not only dignity but fun.  so there i sat.....with my unskilled hands for sewing, a pretty old scarf i never wear......thread, needle and mom's gold handled bird scissors.  and off we went.....my new little friend for inspiration and i (a completely unknown fashion designer for dolls everywhere) to clothe her.  i wondered who had loved her .......what little girl had told this tiny doll secrets.  shared hopes and dreams ... played dress up and party and let's have some tea.........who was her best friend, her adoptive mum before me?

...drained the pasta, the hot steam rushing up into the air.....permeating every pore.  added italian cheeses......mozzarella, asiago, parmesan......a bit of butter.......spun it around in the pan with the big wooden spoon... letting it melt.....let it become.  ground fresh pepper on top ......let it sink in.......put a portion on a pretty (round edged) square blue plate.  topped it with delicious fragrant tomato meat sauce......letting it rest under a domed glass lid.  any meal......any moment can become a festival if you let it.

you can be more......how?  because you are so much more than any one thing.  you are not defined by circumstance, situation......you are you.  a delightful person with possibiliities.  on your very worst day......even when it hurts the most.  when the light is too bright.....when people are cold. when the world is so far away......when no one is holding your hand.

turn on the music......whatever music moves and takes you ---- let it........you are precious.

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so my new little girl......my dolly friend has a lovely new outfit.  a soft crinkled fabric of light cream, sprinkled with tiny coral flowers, delicate green leaves.  it drapes across and around her, she is elegant in her sweet long gown.  ready to face life.....although i found her naked, she was unafraid.....waiting for someone to find her, take her home.  give her a new adventure.....a new place to shine.

she has a matching shawl.....with long fringe around her slender shoulders.  her scarf is just lovely.  placed on her head so that it sits elegantly....rolled the fabric just below her ear into the shape of a coiled flower.......she is ready.  she is in a new life.  

she needs a name.

........fancilful?  yes, but peace is good.  contentment is for all of us....it's not about status......or position. it's about the way you hold your head up inside even when you can't on the outside.  that you still recognise and claim that part of  yourself that is NOT FORGOTTEN.  who you were before was simply part of the many chapters of your life........

time to dine.....bon appetito.

this day almost makes me wish for wine........but only almost.  i feel too good to change a thing.  this moment, this time with you is the thing.  the enough of it all. 

so let's lift our imaginary glasses of bubbly and drink to the little bits of heaven.....here on earth!