Let everything fall apart?
So Yougospam really hit home with me on the comment about my last post. All the words were so very valid. After thinking, this is the only way in me to respond, and I do this with the utmost respect.
I know I can't fix what is wrong in my wife. All I can do is hopefully make things so she might want to fix things. Do I deserve her commitment and love? Do I deserve to feel trust and secure in this relationship? I believe I do. Do I deserve to look elsewhere for a partner with those qualities? I don't care if I might; I want my wife to be that partner. She is an integral component of this family of mine. I love my wife with everything in me, even when she hurts and frustrates me. Like a song I heard recently, I will love her recklessly even if it makes me bleed.
I have no doubt that if I were to stop trying, no one would be (trying). The hope would disappear like smoke in the wind. Everything we've built together the past 14 years would crumble around us. How true to my heart, my marriage, my family and my faith would I be to simply step back and let that happen? I know my efforts may not stop it, but my lack of effort would certainly accelerate it.
So I will continue to fight for my love, this marriage, and my family. I may not have any say in whether we succeed, but I will not willingly stop trying.
I know I can't fix what is wrong in my wife. All I can do is hopefully make things so she might want to fix things. Do I deserve her commitment and love? Do I deserve to feel trust and secure in this relationship? I believe I do. Do I deserve to look elsewhere for a partner with those qualities? I don't care if I might; I want my wife to be that partner. She is an integral component of this family of mine. I love my wife with everything in me, even when she hurts and frustrates me. Like a song I heard recently, I will love her recklessly even if it makes me bleed.
I have no doubt that if I were to stop trying, no one would be (trying). The hope would disappear like smoke in the wind. Everything we've built together the past 14 years would crumble around us. How true to my heart, my marriage, my family and my faith would I be to simply step back and let that happen? I know my efforts may not stop it, but my lack of effort would certainly accelerate it.
So I will continue to fight for my love, this marriage, and my family. I may not have any say in whether we succeed, but I will not willingly stop trying.
Replies
I think that you should fight with all you have to save your marriage. Leave nothing behind. Put it all out there. Then you will have no regrets. I wish I had it in me to fight as hard as you are. I am just not sure I can fight like you when I feel the hope fading. I am afraid that I will be worse off when my husband pulls the plug on this marriage. Maybe my thoughts are flawed and you do give me hope when I read your posts. Like maybe I should have the courage to fight as well. So keep doing what you feel is right. Only you know what is best for you. Good luck. I wish you the best.
@Broken - Thank you so much for taking the time to read and respond. Your kind words mean a lot when things are bleak. I hope so very much things get better for you for you are a wonderful soul.
Yes fight my friend. Fight until you know that you have lost. I fought for her with all I had and still lost. I don\'t regret doing so. I pray that you come out triumphant. Best to you my friend. Hearing your story gives me hope for the future.
I fought for my marriage until he left me for the last time..........as much as it hurt to be rejected again and again and going after him every time he left, I know I did all that I could do to save our marriage so I have no regrets on my end. I don\'t have any doubt in my mind and heart that at least I tried and that I didn\'t quit, he did. It is such a painful time of life, know that we are all rooting for you and your marriage. Like Sadbutrue said, \"fight until you know that you have lost\" Those are such great words, at least you will know you tried. Hugs!