learning to manage my nature
well oh! A different topic for me eh?!! : lol
but seriously I wanted to say that today I felt very separate from my family - in a adult sense - but loving
towards them. I feel like an adult. I am self supporting and currently putting all of my savings
toward my future health care. So i decided today..
I know they nature of my illness may be to look outward for sources of help with
adult type administrative thngs - rather than rely on my own personal evaluative powers -
but I realize it's something I can and must do. I do run a tight ship with my finances
and my admin files and car care and friendships. And so I realize that life is about a combination
of having relationships that are supportive in special cases - like asking my social worker, who is
disabled, if he has a dentist, who takes medicaid, that he believes in and so forth.
We have to rely on our own evaluative powers and then also draw on the resources
of our relationships and truly appreciate those people who show good kindnesses to you.
I have found myself spinning today after making inquiries with my social worker
and trying to determine what to do with my time and effort. I've been really spinning
fantasy - but then I know I have to look above and beyond the spinning. That
I have to learn to manage this nature of mine so that I keep on keeping on.
Replies
It's great that you're breaking down what is most important Mark and looking to your future...xo
Thanks Janet!
"managing your nature."
i like that ALLOT!
one of the mantras i have benefited from during my transitional phases is, "let the dream motivate. let reality dictate." with this mantra, i can go ahead and give flight to those more outrageous fantasies. it's okay to reach for the stars. just keep it real when you try to launch your datsun out of cape canaveral.
hahahaha !!! xxxoo
I think managing natures comes to fruition in a “click”…. Like remember when learning to ride a bike and you suddenly were doing it all by yourself with nobody holding the back of the seat?
I know we have illnesses but I think it’s important to not sell yourself short. We can be quirky and endearing alongside mental illness.
It’s important to frame your perspective on it all as not a sign of weakness. Let it be your superpower. (Hugs)
Thanks Nikki
Do you mean your wheels are spinning and you feel like you're going now where?
It's real important to be in touch with what you want - whether it's fantasy or
pragmatic - and then our freedom comes in the ability to choose - whether that it's good for you or not is a good measuring stick
for me. Sometimes I think the spinning (like the creation of art) is coming from a place of pain or darkness and confusion
that needs to be expressed or resolved. I honor the spinning in myself - the engine of wisdom eh? -
I just think what I I think what I have learned is that the spinning really helps me be clear about certain things. But also the spinning brings
the clarity of what is spinning (and what it's for) (and if it's me taking care of my nature as it collides with life) so that I can be sure
to allow myself that personal endeavor as well as the survival stuff.