Lawyer
I'm finally doing it ... I think. Going to an attorney. I am so scared.
It's been a crazy month or two. He ran out of money at work. We haven't been able to collect a paycheck and truly pay our bills in two months. He's been horrible. Telling me he is the head of the household and I am suppose to back his decisions even when they se absurd and cost us lots of money. He's listening to God and doing what is right in God's eyes. He gave a woman $2,800 during this time to buy her out of a work contract so she could come to work for him. With out my knowledge.
He accused me of having an affair. He offered for me to name my amount to get a divorce. Tell him what amount of money I needed from him for me to go file for divorce. When I told him I wouldn't file for any amount of money he decided my affair must be with a woman and she must be blackmailing me. If it was a man then I would take his offer of money and divorce him to be with another man. But since I didn't my affair must be with a woman because I wouldn't leave him for a woman I would be too ashamed. (His logic). He kept asking me what I wanted since I'm not willing to divorce him... I told him I wanted some financial security. So he decided my "affair" was really a love of money. We argued about how me having sex with him was part of my marriage vows but he didn't have to provide for me financially. He moved out. He wanted to cancel my credit card. Just give me cash how he saw fit. Says he refuses to pay for wants. He's only going to for needs. He moved out for about 2.5 weeks. And then told me he was going to charge me $1,000 a month for him to live some where else. Unless I agreed he could come home and be head of household, that he was going to be the only one spending money. He would do the shopping and take my car to get gas. He kept telling me how i needed to regain his trust. Although I never did anything to break trust. He would set s budget and I would bend over backwards to stick to it. And yet he gave some woman $2,800 without my knowledge but wants to accuse me of mistrust. I never agreed but he moved home anyways. He can't cancel my credit card because I opened it over 15 yrs ago in my name. He went to the bank while he was moved out and opened a checking account without me. Soooo tonight I told him I want my name on the account and offered a budget I think we could make work once we pay off our current credit card debt. He refused. I told him to leave and that I was getting a lawyer. He refused. Later tonight. He asked what I wanted to do with my allowance. I told him I didn't quite understand what he was taking about. He said he was wondering what i wanted to do with the extra Imoney I had earned (my allowance from him for good behavior, sex, bible study etc) He wsnts to pay off the credit cards as quickly as possible. I agree that makes the most sense. Why wouldn't we just do that. I don't understand what your asking. He replies...I'm just trying to figure out how you're going to pay for an attorney. Well. I'm going to put it on my credit card. He doesn't think that's right. That I need to wait till I can have some allowance saved up to pay for my attorney.
Told me how I've spent $2,000 w out his permission before. Which I haven't. Not in a lump sum.
He's made me feel like the bad guy in all this. Why can't I keep a clear head and remember all the wrong he's done.
It's been a crazy month or two. He ran out of money at work. We haven't been able to collect a paycheck and truly pay our bills in two months. He's been horrible. Telling me he is the head of the household and I am suppose to back his decisions even when they se absurd and cost us lots of money. He's listening to God and doing what is right in God's eyes. He gave a woman $2,800 during this time to buy her out of a work contract so she could come to work for him. With out my knowledge.
He accused me of having an affair. He offered for me to name my amount to get a divorce. Tell him what amount of money I needed from him for me to go file for divorce. When I told him I wouldn't file for any amount of money he decided my affair must be with a woman and she must be blackmailing me. If it was a man then I would take his offer of money and divorce him to be with another man. But since I didn't my affair must be with a woman because I wouldn't leave him for a woman I would be too ashamed. (His logic). He kept asking me what I wanted since I'm not willing to divorce him... I told him I wanted some financial security. So he decided my "affair" was really a love of money. We argued about how me having sex with him was part of my marriage vows but he didn't have to provide for me financially. He moved out. He wanted to cancel my credit card. Just give me cash how he saw fit. Says he refuses to pay for wants. He's only going to for needs. He moved out for about 2.5 weeks. And then told me he was going to charge me $1,000 a month for him to live some where else. Unless I agreed he could come home and be head of household, that he was going to be the only one spending money. He would do the shopping and take my car to get gas. He kept telling me how i needed to regain his trust. Although I never did anything to break trust. He would set s budget and I would bend over backwards to stick to it. And yet he gave some woman $2,800 without my knowledge but wants to accuse me of mistrust. I never agreed but he moved home anyways. He can't cancel my credit card because I opened it over 15 yrs ago in my name. He went to the bank while he was moved out and opened a checking account without me. Soooo tonight I told him I want my name on the account and offered a budget I think we could make work once we pay off our current credit card debt. He refused. I told him to leave and that I was getting a lawyer. He refused. Later tonight. He asked what I wanted to do with my allowance. I told him I didn't quite understand what he was taking about. He said he was wondering what i wanted to do with the extra Imoney I had earned (my allowance from him for good behavior, sex, bible study etc) He wsnts to pay off the credit cards as quickly as possible. I agree that makes the most sense. Why wouldn't we just do that. I don't understand what your asking. He replies...I'm just trying to figure out how you're going to pay for an attorney. Well. I'm going to put it on my credit card. He doesn't think that's right. That I need to wait till I can have some allowance saved up to pay for my attorney.
Told me how I've spent $2,000 w out his permission before. Which I haven't. Not in a lump sum.
He's made me feel like the bad guy in all this. Why can't I keep a clear head and remember all the wrong he's done.
Replies
he is a sick man- mentally ill- u need professional guidance as to how to separate yourself from him in the best way possible. Do not give him any clues as to your plans. He has your mind so jumbled up with his manipulative control, I wish I could say something that would help u, but I am not an expert, and that\'s the only advice u need at this time. God bless, and good luck to u