Knew it wouldn't last but love will last
Just got a message from our oldest GD that none of them will be able to come to visit. When we returned our other GD yesterday, all ES would do was grunt. We had wonderful weekends with each one of them. They know we love them and they love us and I don't think even ES can do anything about that.. In 1 1/2 years, oldest GD will be driving and I think we will see more of them then. If ES thinks he is just sending them on their birthday and Christmas just to get gifts, he couldn't be more wrong. We have amazing times filled with love that is worth more than anything.Thanks for being with me.
Replies
I am so very sorry your ES is twisting the knife again. It is the constant and impossible to understand quicksilver changes that our EC make that makes this so difficult and exhausting. I am so glad you got those precious times alone with each of the 3 grandchildren, and that they were such good visits. You can hold onto those memories. And when those children turn 18, their father and his GF can no longer keep them from you. Also, your son has turned tail and done the opposite of what he said he\'s going to, several times, so I hold out hope that he will change again to letting you see the grandchildren. Your grandchildren are so blessed to have you. You are a very good person.
Whyonlychild... I am so so sorry to read about the latest development! It was starting to look so great for you! And I am sooo glad that you had some precious times with your GC!!! And they will remember the special times spent with you! Maybe, hopefully, your ES will come around again and change his mind yet again! Until then, may precious memories sustain you! Sending you a great big hug!!!!
Thank you for your support and understanding. Some one asked me if ES is bipolar? I really don\'t know because these personality and mental traits were not seen when he was a child. I just know whether it is evil, his GF or mental illness, he is fighting his own battle within. I pray foft him and the GC constantly. That\'s all I can do is put it into God\'s hands. Thanks for understanding and caring. Yes, he can never truly take them away.
That is unfortunate. But they know who you are, and enjoy being with you. And you had really good visits with them. Like others said, he\'s changed his mind before and may again.
I totally get what you are sharing so much.
I took the role of mom very seriously and loved every moment. The nightmare began when our oldest son was murdered outside of Stoneham, CO, where he had a mechanic shop. In the middle of nowhere. He went to help someone and they shot him and put his body in a garbage bag and left him on the side of road closes to Wiggins, CO. Someone on the 14th of Feb. 1993 saw him and the bags that they tried to use. After all of this time went on and our two daughters withdrew and kept their children(8 at that time)from us. I was working at the school as a T.A. for Special Ed, so I did get to hug one or two of them now and then. Wow!! Our oldest daughter became so distressed and felt that she couldn\'t put up with her husbands abuse and we totally helped her to try to get the divorce. In the meantime, her 9 living children were struggling to please one or the other of them. They didn\'t live closeby when she died of a stroke. Eight years before this she had an aneurisum in the brain. She was pregnant for her sixth baby and they had her in a coma for 32 days. We were there the entire time and overwrought. The baby was delivered and healthy and she recovered, but lost her short term memory. Wow, how to write this and make any sense. Anyway, the youngest two adult children decided to ignore us at our daughter\'s funeral. This really cooked my brain and I felt so disconnected. I have Fibromyalgia and of course stress makes the pain worse. Up to date, my son has come to see me, after I cried a few weeks ago and talked to his answering service. Thank God he did come over the next morning. I was told if I asked for forgiveness to his wife DIL, things may go back to normal??? I agreed. My husband really wasn\'t into it , but he agreed. Nothing happened, so I wrote him a text and he did reply to that and was a nice message. The younger daughter has been very supportive within the last two mo. Before the death 13 mo. ago we were fairly close. What is up with the generation of the 80\'s and 90\'s? They want to tell you what is wrong with you and how they need to have trangressions forgiven to them for?? We were good parents, not great, cause we aren\'t perfect. My letter tells him how I\'d love to have the relationship, but not to be walking on eggs and pins and needles. I hope he gets it, cause otherwise I just don\'t want to handle another rejection or death. My DH is amazingly supportive and where I live the therapists are as scarce as Hen\'s Teeth. Thank you so much for reading this and if you have ?\'s just ask I am so very sorry that you have to go through this painful forsaken parent struggle and grandparent. We don\'t see her children now and it hurts awfully bad. The depression really took over control and I kept up with prayers, but almost ended it with my own hand. Thank God I didn\'t do it. Worse pain than any surgery I have dealt with. God Bless You for sharing and I can relate, but you are very strong in your\' belief and faith, which is such a wonder to me. I began to doubt there at the end of the 6 mo. period of pain that depression provides.