kind of felt lost again this morning....
....but then the sun started to come up and my mind's headlights
started to turn on... and my mood rose up...
I rememebered again to cherish my friends and family, my tasks
for the morning...
I can be so hyper aware of the slights that have come my way in
the previous days or along the path of my life, while getting on
with showering and dressing - and it inspires
a sense of injustice and righteousness with the complaint of those
issues...saving them all for my therapist to observe......but none of us are perfect...i must offer some bewildering
contradictions at times as well. I try to be constant, I try to be true
and I guess that reminds me of the idea that my therapist said that
we're all trying our best with the best that we have at and indeed
we're just human - we're not rules, we're not imagery - we're animals
in the final analysis - and we need to cuddles, lattitude and forgiveness :).
I guess this morning I was yearning for a sense of strength about myself..
it seemed to be unperceivable at the outset ....and some in my life ever seem to take
the power position to control the relationship, hammering me down....which is frustrating
and debilitating... I came home last night after being with my
parents and my own life seemed to be such an after thought - when i got home --
and I felt whispy thin - but I regrouped and found strength in thinking
about my community and my chores at hand..
No big realization this morning, other than the fact
that I need to keep going....and if folks here in my outside of
the site life want to use
the hammer of their personalities with me - don't believe
you go unseen or uncounted... it's not appreciated...
and your not invisible. Anyways, here goes..
a day of moving my parents from their house - to a nother.
meh ... lol
Replies
Blue's calling!
Gmorning Mark.
Hope the move goes well. It’s nice of you to help.
Do you mean that you feel others in family treat you like you’re delicate due to past issues with the illness? And so they feel like they have to push or forcibly encourage you? I don’t want to misconstrue what you express so if I’m off then please correct me.
If not though and that’s sort of it, then I can relate to that….where everyone thinks they know best for me. I try to remember that they are coming from a place of love and concern and wanting to offer what is helpful guidance in their mind. It doesn’t come off that way all the time….but the good intentions are there.
I usually just politely smile and nod and take it with a grain of salt. You’re doing fine…and at your pace, and on your terms. If you want to push through more, then like the end of the Wizard of Oz: you have had the power all along…. and you can do it!
Thanks Nikki, that’s not exactly what I meant but i very very much appreciate the note back!
Hola
I’m not so good with my words today but just wanted to know you have my support
Throughout the day with all the moving stuff I hope you can take deep breathes when you need to & picture us in your back pocket rooting you on
Aqui contigo, one moment at a time
Big hug <3
Thanks lil missy!
Oh poo. I tried. Sometimes I’m not the best “listener” or “interpreter.”
In any case, have a good day. Know your worth and value. Hug of support.
Thanks Nikki!